Mudblood
by DoradaWolf20
Summary: After living through some of her darkest days, Sira Volkov has made it out alive. With the desire to leave the Death Eaters, she attempts to right the wrongs she made over the last few years, but the Death Eaters have other plans for her. Will she be able to become a better person, or will her darkness take her again?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

One can feel the electricity of war in the air. It is certain, inevitable. The world is changing, and with change, there is conflict. Only, I am in a game of love and loss. I do not want war. I want to love, I want to live, but the world seems to be fighting against me, making living harder and harder to do.

I feel that there will be much to fight in the months to come but I'm ready for combat. Not a physical war but a mental one, one where I am not fighting another living being but the world itself, my world. I will fight to continue to live and love for I have already lost once in this crazy game and I can't afford to lose again.

Sira sat at the kitchen table with her friend, Calypso. Around them, papers were scattered everywhere, covering the table with its disarray. She hand a quill in her right hand as her bright, blue eyes gazed down at her paper. All of her attention was on that piece of paper while Cal's was traveling around the room from the window to the doorway, from her pale-gold hair to her fingernails.

The last few weeks had been busy for them with the Death Eaters being extremely active and, on top of that, they had to plan Cal's wedding. This had kept Sira busier than when she was with the Death Eaters for she wanted everything to be perfect for her friend. She already owed her so much for her support through the last year so this was the least she could do.

"Okay, Cal," Sira said as her blue eyes looked up from her paper and her vacant hand went into her dark-brown, loosely-curly hair, "can I read you the guest list? I only have Death Eaters right now." Cal's attention turned to Sira as a smile flashed across her face.

"Sure, Sira," she said quickly.

"I have Alecto Carrow, Amycus Carrow, Antionin Dolohov, Avery, Bellatrix, Crabbe, Gibbon, Goyle, the Malfoy's, Nott, Severus Snape, Thorfinne Rowle, Travers, Walden Macnair," she listed proudly, "Worm-."

"Eww, no. He's not coming," Cal interrupted rapidly and Sira scratched Wormtail from the list.

"Jugson, Mulciber," Sira started again, "Yaxley-."

"No," Cal spat at the name. She had never like Yaxley. She thought that he was too cocky and full of himself and Sira scratched him off the list as well.

"Rabastan Lestrange," Sira stated, waiting for Cal to make a comment, "Rodolphus Lestrange, Selwyn, and the Dark Lord." Sira looked at Cal, who had a look of disgust on her face. They shook their head together and Sira crossed off the Dark Lord. He wouldn't come anyway so why bother?

"Sira, you forgot two people," Cal stated with a playful smile on her face.

"We don't have Lark's list yet or the family list so we'll be missing people," she said as she read through her list again.

"Yes, but you forget two people on this list," Cal stressed.

"Who?" she asked, sounding completely baffled. She had triple checked the list and there was absolutely no one she forgot.

"You and Scabior!" Cal shrieked with a bit of spirited laughter in her voice. Sira shook her head as she wrote her name and Scabior's down on the paper, not believing that she forgot herself and her fiancé. Her cheeks reddened a bit with the thought of him. He had helped her so much just as Cal had. He had stabilized her; he had become her rock, her Sirius. She rolled her eyes, causing her thoughts to break, as Lark, Cal's fiancé, walked into the kitchen.

"Busy planning?" he asked as he pulled up a chair beside Cal. She gazed at him sweetly as her ice-blue eyes glittered with her passion and Lark smiled at her.

"Yes, do you know who you want to invite, Lark?" Sira asked quickly as she looked up at him. He was much more like the Lark she met in Azkaban, before she ever played with his heart, when he was with Cal, which made Sira happy. She didn't want Lark to suffer from what she did to him, and, even though he still hated her, he finally seemed to be accepting her as a nice person and not a sick, twisted piece-of-filth that deserved to rot in prison.

"Sure, and I'll write them down for you, too," he said and she handed him the paper and the quill. "Okay," he mumbled as he set the list down in front of him. "Edward, Jacob, Seth, Nicholas," he muttered as he scribbled down the names, "Antonio, Philip, Fredric, Vladimir, Damien, Red, Michael, Cade, Reese, Marcus, Victor, Mathew, Jonathan, James, Robert, Lucas, Adam, Xavier." He read through his list quickly and then handed it back to Sira. She gave him a little, friendly smile and read through it too.

"So, Lark, how does it feel to soon be a married man?" she asked kindly as she looked into his emerald-green eyes.

"It's the most wonderful feeling in the world," he explained avidly, "especially knowing that I will spend the rest of my life with the woman that I can't live without." Cal flashed him a big smile as she continued to gaze at him with desire in her eyes. "So when's your wedding, Sira? Aren't you engaged to Scabior?" he asked with a hint of the old coldness returning to his eyes.

"Yeah, but we haven't made a date," she explained softly. "We want to wait until our lives slow down a bit, when everything settles down. I'm just guessing that it'll be sometime next year." She didn't like to talk about when she was getting married; she didn't want to rush into it because she and Scabior had time, all the time in the world.

"Ah, okay," Lark said slowly as his attention returned to Cal. He put his arm around her shoulders and smiled at her. He leaned in close and Sira felt like she was intruding on a special moment. She stood from her chair and started to walk quietly out of the kitchen.

"Sira, where are you going?" Cal asked, causing her to turn around and gaze at her friend.

"I was going to leave you two alone," she stated sheepishly as ran her hand through her dark-brown hair, "but if you don't want me to go, I won't and we can keep working." Cal gave her a kind, friendly smile

"I've had enough planning for today so if you want to go, you can," she said happily with a little laughter in her voice. "I just was going to remind you of the meeting tonight, the very important, mandatory meeting tonight." Yes, the Death Eater meeting, Sira told herself, I almost forgot.

"Yes," she breathed, "I was going to go early."

"Then you better get going," Cal said playfully, "because I know that you mean an hour before when you say early and it's nearly that time." Sira rolled her eyes, even though Cal was right about her definition of early. She headed out of the kitchen and down the hallway to the front door, only pausing to open it. Once she was outside, she drew her wand from her hip as she closed the door. The fresh air invigorated her as she breathed it in deeply. With a soft pop, she vanished from the doorstep and the warm night.

She found herself on the doorstep of the Malfoy Manor and quickly knocked on the door. Her eyes gazed off into the night as she waited, thinking about everything other than the Death Eaters' business here tonight. She heard of the 'release' of the Death Eaters from Azkaban and was eager to talk to Lucius because she wanted to prove to him that she was not crazy, as he thought so, and to brag a little about her single-handed escaped from imprisonment. She wasn't going to milk the fact that she used Lark, more that she actually escaped.

The door of the house opened and she smiled at the person in the doorway. "Hello, Lucius," she breathed as he gazed at her with his cold, grey eyes but he couldn't hide the old longing that flared within them.

"Hello, Sira," he said in a rough voice, desperately trying to hide his passion and his desire. He ushered her into the house and closed the door quickly behind them. He gazed at her with a mixture of fear, concern, and worry that shone in his eyes as his body moved closer to hers, she could feel the heat radiating off of him. "I need to speak with you," he whispered into her ear, "in private."

"Of course, Lucius," she said back and he led her to and up the staircase and into a study that seemed to be barely used for it looked untouched and perfect. He closed the door behind her and put a charm on the room, so no one could hear their conversation, before turning to her. "What's wrong?" He shot her a completely baffled look.

"What's wrong? Where do I start? I was released from Azkaban to find that my home was taken by the Dark Lord, that Draco was assigned to kill Dumbledore and, if he didn't, he would be killed instead, that Narcissa was forced to suffer through all of this, and that you didn't do anything to help her," he explained in a vicious growl. "She's your friend, you should've done something." A look of utter shock covered her face. Was he blaming her for all of this?

"Lucius, let's remember that I was in Azkaban," she hissed, agitated with him.

"For like two months!" he barked savagely.

"What was I supposed to do?" she asked in a growl as anger filled her blue eyes. "I can't go against our Lord's wishes so I couldn't do anything to stop him. If I did, I would lose the last shred of trust that he has in me. I can't afford to be a traitor again to him, Lucius! I just can't!"

"When did you start caring about trust? You never used to and now I'm the one, my whole family's the one that he doesn't trust anymore," he snapped as his grey eyes burned with his fury. "I lost it in Azkaban and I don't even know how!" He slammed his hand on a writing desk, the sound causing her to stiffen. His breathes came in pants with his wrath. The tension was thick in the air as they gazed at each other, not saying a word.

"Lucius, this last year has been difficult for everyone," she said, finally breaking the silence, "and it's been especially difficult for your family and me." She paused, thinking if this was the right time for an apology for her causing him and his family to suffer. "I'm sorry if I messed everything up for you." He gave her a puzzled look as some of the fire left his eyes. "If you didn't love me, you would've been able to escape that day in the Department of Mysteries, Lucius, meaning that you wouldn't have gone to Azkaban. Then, Draco wouldn't have to been ordered to do that task, Narcissa wouldn't have suffered, and your family wouldn't have lost the Dark Lord's trust. None of this would be happening if it wasn't for me." He shook his head and ran his hand through his white-blond hair.

"You can't blame yourself for what has happened to my family," he breathed as his grey eyes looked at her, they were soft and caring. "It's not your fault and I shouldn't have blamed you for anything either. It's out of our control and I'm sorry for blaming you. You didn't deserve to be blamed." He moved to her, causing her to back up against the wall. His eyes showed his longing as he cupped her face, a shot of fear went through her.

"Lucius," she hissed as she pushed him away, disgusted with him, "we can't do that anymore. I'm engaged to be married." A startled look covered his face.

"What? When did this happen?" he asked, sounding completely baffled. "With who?"

"I'm engaged with Scabior," she said lightly. "He asked me a while ago." Suddenly, the door to the room opened and Draco, Lucius's son, walked in. he closed the door and his eyes filled with horror as he looked at them. Even though she had pushed Lucius away, he still had her against the wall and was too close to be taken as friendly.

"Father, what are you doing?" Draco asked in a growl as rage entered his eyes. "What are you thinking? We already have a bad reputation with all the Death Eaters and now I find you with a filthy half-blood in a room alone. What? Are you cheating on mother?" He stepped closer to his father, brimming with his fury. "Are you cheating on mother with a no-good, piece-of-filth half-blood that doesn't even know her boundaries? How can you do this, father? How can you do this to your family?" Lucius stepped away from her and faced his son, anger burning viciously in his eyes and through his body.

"We didn't do anything, Draco," he snarled cruelly. "We weren't doing anything and how dare you speak to your father in that tone!" Draco let out a little snicker as his eyes grew colder.

"You're the reason we've lost the Dark Lord's trust," he hissed as he stepped closer to his father again, "and it doesn't help when someone finds you alone with a half-blood. And about my tone, I can say whatever I want to you. You have ruined my life!" they stared at each other furiously as Sira edge her way over to the door very slowly and silently. Once she reached it, she opened it and slipped out but not before hearing Lucius' last comment.

"Draco, what no one knows will never hurt them," he growled in a low but harsh voice. Sira slid out into the hall and closed the door gently behind her. She turned and headed down the hall to find where the Death Eater meeting was being held, concern flaring in her chest as she wondered if Draco would tell anyone what he had seen.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

She walked into a drawing room that had a long, polished, wood table with many, silent, somber-looking people sitting around it. Furniture was pushed back against the walls and Sira's eyes focused on the reflection of a human figure rotating slowly on the table and in the mirror around the mantle of the fireplace. "Volkov," a voice said from the head of the table, "it is good to see you." He was directly in front of the fireplace, his face seeming to glow in the darkness of the room. Her blue eyes pierced through the gloom to his face. "Sit down there, Volkov," he hissed flatly and she took the seat that he directed her to, at the end of the table that she was standing at on the right side.

All of the people around the table watched her, their gazes fierce but empty. "So, Volkov, how is your fiancé?" the Dark Lord asked in a cold hiss.

"He is well, my Lord," she said loudly as she looked directly into his crimson eyes that seemed to burn in the gloom.

"That is good to hear," he stated flatly, "and I would like to speak with you after the meeting." Everyone seemed to stiffen with their fear for her but she didn't feel anything as she gazed into his eyes, never breaking the stare.

"As you wish, my Lord," she said proudly. He nodded his head as his attention turned to the door. Sira watched it as it opened and the Malfoy's stepped inside. Lucius glared at her as did Draco, both of their eyes holding fury. She shrugged as the Dark Lord motioned them to their seats, under the rotating figure above the table. They sat in silence, only the sound of the crackling fire present in the room and the occasional opening and closing of the door. Soon, everyone was there except for two people, even Cal was there and sitting happily beside her. They didn't talk to one another but they didn't have the feeling that everyone else seemed to have, the feeling that any second they were going to be punished.

Finally, the last two entered the room, Snape and Yaxley. "Yaxley. Snape. You are very nearly late," the Dark Lord said in a clear voice. Sira looked at Draco who was looking at the person rotating and hanging over the table, he had fear in his eyes and she was glaring at him a little. "Severus, here," he said as he motioned to a seat at his right. "Yaxley, beside Dolohov." They took their places and Sira continued to glare at Draco while everyone else watched Snape. "So?"

"My Lord, the Order of the Phoenix intends to move Harry Potter from his current place of safety on Saturday at nightfall," Snape said flatly as everyone now, including Sira, focused on him. The Dark Lord repeated the last three words as he stared into Snape's eyes so fiercely that some had to look away out of their terror. Then, Yaxley leaned forward.

"My Lord, I have heard differently," he said. "Dawlish, the Auror, let slip that Potter will not be moved until the thirtieth, the night before the boy turns seventeen." Then, Snape smiled and said that it was a false trail and that a Confundus Charm was place upon Dawlish. There was some back and forth and then the Dark Lord looked at the body over the table, lost in thought. Sira watched with fascination, but still not scared. Then, he asked where the boy was going to be taken and Snape answered him, saying that he would be at the home of someone in the Order.

Soon, the subject turned to when the Ministry of Magic would fall. They had one man, Pius Thinknesse, in a good position but they needed more than one man, even Sira knew that. But she, alone with the Dark Lord, doubted that the Ministry would fall before the day the boy was moved.

After discussing how Harry was going to travel, the Dark Lord started to speak again. "I shall attend to the boy in person," he said as he watched the body again. "There have been too many mistakes where Harry Potter is concerned. Some of them have been my own. That Potter lives is due more to my errors that his triumphs." A shot of fear when through Sira as a memory flashed in her mind.

She was about to walk out of Dumbledore's office last year when she turned and looked at Harry. "I may be a Death Eater, and I may have done some awful things," she told him with a smile, "but I still believe in you and you have my protection."

She had completely forgotten about the meeting until a scream broke her away from her thoughts, jumping a little in her surprise. "As I was saying," the Dark Lord said cruelly as he looked into each and every one of their faces, "I understand better now. I shall need, for instance, to borrow a wand from one of you before I go to kill Potter." She gave him an utterly horrified look but so did everyone else, even Cal. "No Volunteers? Let's see… Lucius, I see no reason for you to have a wand anymore."

Lucius looked up with horror in his eyes; Sira had never seen him that frightened. "My Lord?" he asked in a hoarse voice, in complete disbelief.

"Your wand, Lucius. I require your wand." Lucius looked to Narcissa but she didn't look back as he drew his wand and passed it to the Dark Lord. Sira actually felt sorry for Lucius, he had suffered so much already and now he was forced to suffer more. She couldn't help thinking that she should stand and give the Dark Lord her wand so Lucius wouldn't have to lose anymore. In her heart, she wanted to stand and defend him but in her mind, she wanted to sit, to stay where she was.

The urge grew stronger as the Dark Lord continued to insult Lucius and his family. Yes, he had made some mistakes and yes, he deserved to be punished but this was too much, it was immoral, unethical. Her blue eyes burned with her fury as she stared at her folded hands in her lap. Her body was stiff and trying hard not to quake with her rage. Bellatrix started to say how much of a pleasure it was to have him in their home and Sira suppressed the urge to hiss out of disgust.

Then, the Dark Lord mocked Bellatrix and the Malfoy's for now being in-laws with a werewolf. This comment caused many to laugh, but Sira only snarled to herself, not knowing why she felt so strongly. Draco gave his father a terrified look, seeming to lose all of the anger from earlier but Lucius didn't notice for he was in a position much like Sira was in. Narcissa shook her at her son and then stared blankly at the opposite wall.

She felt like she was going to be sick as the Dark Lord silenced the laughter, as he stroked the great snake that now hung around his shoulder. Then, he motioned everyone's attention to the body over the table. "For those of you who do not know, we are joined here tonight by Charity Burbage who, until recently, taught at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Yes… Professor Burbage taught the children of witches and wizards all about Muggles… how they are not so different from us…" the Dark Lord hissed. Sira was losing it; all of this was so wrong. She was going to be physically sick. "Avada Kedavra!" the Dark Lord barked.

There was a flash of green light and Charity fell to the table below with a crash. Many of the Death Eaters jumped out of their seats and away from the body. Draco had fallen to the floor. Sira continued to sit where she was, anger causing her heart to hammer in her chest. "Dinner, Nagini," the Dark Lord hissed as the snake slithered off of his shoulders and onto the polished wood of the table.

She heard the sounds of disgust coming from the other Death Eaters as they watched the snake consume its meal but she refused to watch. She was too furious to care about anyone else. She was also disgusted with the Dark Lord and with herself. She shouldn't be feeling for Lucius, she loves Scabior, and yet she still did. The longing to snarl again filled her.

"Friends, you are dismissed," the Dark Lord hissed softly as Nagini slid off the table, her belly bursting with her meal. The Death Eaters stood and quickly headed for the door, all except for her. Cal looked at her, puzzled and questioning, but Sira just looked at her, her blue eyes filled with her anger as she shook her head. Her friend turned and headed out of the room as Sira leaned back in her chair.

Her chest rose as she inhaled deeply, her head up and her eyes focused blankly at the opposite wall. All was quiet except for the crackling of the fire behind her Lord. They were the only ones in the room. His gaze weighed upon her heavily but she didn't dare to look at him, she kept her blank stare on the wall. "Volkov, you seem less than happy with the meeting," he said in a soft hiss. It caught her off guard, sending fear through her and making her look at him.

His crimson eyes bored into hers, she wanted to look away but she didn't dare to, she was too terrified. An evil smile formed on his face as he continued to gaze at him. She wanted to scream for her body was slowly growing colder with each passing second. "Are you not happy with my treatment of Lucius?" She jumped a little in her seat.

"How dare you accuse me of this, my Lord?" she asked horrified. "I love Scabior. My heart belongs to him."

"Lies... Volkov," he said coldly. "Lies coming from someone I used to trust, someone I held up with high regard. I thought you were better than that, especially since I have trained you, I have groomed you, to be someone better than that, someone would not stoop to lies and secrecy like the Malfoy's have."

"My Lord, I-," she breathed with her dread.

"But you still feel for Lucius, Volkov," he snarled cruelly but so softly it cut like a knife, "you still long for him. You feel that my distrust in him is wrong but it is you who is wrong. At least you are revolted with yourself, which leads me to believe that you still are the person I made you to be." She looked away for a moment and then dropped her eyes from his face. "Volkov, you are not going to be put at the same rank in my standards as the Malfoy's but, only to caution you, if you continue the way you are, you will be placed with them. Do you want that? Do you want to be shamed in front of your fellow Death Eaters?"

"No, my Lord, I don't want to be ridiculed," she said quietly as she looked into his face again with fear starting to leave her eyes, "for I have come too far to be treated that way."

"So will you continue to speak dishonesties, keep secrets, or long for a man when you are bound to another?" he asked, his red eyes showing no emotion.

"No, my Lord," she panted. "I will not." He smiled at her answer.

"Good, Volkov. I knew my little wolf would obey," he growled as she smiled back at him. "You are dismissed." She stood from her seat and bowed to him. She headed slowly and gracefully to the door and started to push it open. "Volkov, one last thing." She turned to him, baffled and confused. In his pale hands, was her mask, her Death Eater mask, which she threw in the Hall of Prophecy that day in the Department of Mysteries. She hadn't seen it since that day.

"My mask?" she whispered with surprise in her voice.

"You will need it," he said flatly as he slid it across the table to her. She picked it up and shifted it in her hands as she examined it. It looked brand-new, like she had never thrown it across a room. Her eyes looked up at the Dark Lord, all of her anger towards him was gone for her was gracious to her.

"Thank you, Master," she panted happily as her eyes filled with her gratitude. "I cannot thank you enough. Thank you." The cold smile on his face softened a little as he gazed at her. He nodded his head to her and she bowed low again. Then, she headed out of the door and was gone, leaving the Dark Lord alone in the dark drawing room with an evil smile on his face.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Three loud knocks on a wooden door filled the hall of the upper level of the tavern. Sira stood at the door that she had just knocked on with her eyes bright and her Death Eater mask in her hands. Her disgust towards herself sat like a rock in her stomach. She still felt angry with the Dark Lord but yet she was grateful for mercy on her. The opposing feelings confused her, making her feel neutral towards him. She pushed away her thought because, right now, all she wanted was Scabior, her fiancé.

It seemed to take forever but the door finally opened. Her eyes gazed at her love fervently as he leaned against the doorway and the look in his eyes made her smile. "'ello, beautiful," he said seductively as his blue-grey eyes studied her. He put his hand in his long hair that was pulled back in a ponytail. He seemed to want to look at her forever. She let out a small giggle as his hand wrapped around her wrist and she stepped into the room. He shut the door behind her with a soft thud and then cupped her face in his hands. He rubbed her cheeks with his thumbs caressingly as she moved into him, her eyes full of desire.

She still couldn't believe how happy he made her, how stable and solid he made her. She felt like her old self when she was with him. "So 'ow was the meeting, lovely?" he asked softly, his voice rich and a little raspy. "I want to know everything that was talked 'bout." Of course he wanted to know; he wanted to be a Death Eater but was never allowed.

So she told him everything that was discussed at the meeting. He listened intently, his eyes full of his curiosity as he held her near. She knew he thirsted for the knowledge of what the Death Eaters were doing just as he longed for power and he desired for her, but his wanting didn't make him an evil man to her. He was actually very understanding, a gentleman. As she finished telling him, he pushed a strand of her shimmering, dark-brown hair out of her face. "That's interesting, beautiful," he whispered as she flashed him a little playful smile. "So, 'ow much are you going to 'ave to do with all of this?" She tilted her head a little.

"Probably quite a bit of it, Scabior," she breathed as her blue eyes glittered in the dim light, "but once the Ministry falls, I'll be free. I won't have to hide anymore, none of the Death Eaters will and, maybe, I can actually move to a place of my own." He shot her a baffled look; it showed more in his eyes than in his face.

"What do you mean?" he questioned quietly. "I thought that you loved living with Cal."

"Yeah, I do," she sighed, "but it's strange now since Lark is there all the time, I just feel so out of place."

"Where will you go then, Sira?" he asked and she shrugged.

"Probably back to my parent's house," she answered flatly. "I have nowhere else to go." An idea glowed in his eyes, growing brighter as she spoke.

"I'll go with you. I'll go wherever you go," he stated proudly. She shook her head at him.

"You don't have to, Scabior," she explained softly as she gazed at him. "Besides, I haven't even been in that house for over a year now. No one's living there so its condition is going to be bad."

"I don't care what the place look like 'cause I'm coming, no matter what." She laughed a little, unable to change his mind and knowing that she never would.

"Okay, let's go soon then," she whispered. "We can get my things from Cal's house later." He smiled at her as he released her from his arms and started to collect his things.

The air was warm even in the coolness of the morning. They had stayed at the tavern the night before for Sira was exhausted after the Death Eater meeting. Scabior seemed eager to leave his tavern room for good and she was glad to have him with her because she didn't know if she would be able to live with the memories that the house caused her to relive. He would make it easier for her. Sira pulled down the hood of her traveling cloak farther over her face as she scanned the surrounding of her front yard. There was nothing but trees, grass, and the house.

The grass of the yard was tall and unkempt, paint chipped off the sides of the house, and a shutter hung limply on its broken hinges. The house was mid-sized and looked as it had been uninhabited for many years. Her eyes gazed at the house sadly. "Scabior," she said softly as she turned to him, "can you put up some protective enchantments?" He nodded and walked a large circle through the grass and the weeds. As she treaded up to the doorstep of her house, she drew her wand from her hip. She didn't know if anyone was in the house and it was better to be safe than sorry.

Her hand found the door knob and she threw the door open. The slam of the door against the wall filled the long-silent house with a sudden sound as her wand aimed straight ahead of her and into the entryway. Ever so slowly, she stepped into the house.

Everything was untouched and exactly the way she left it, all except for the covering of dust that seemed to coat the entire house. "The enchantments are done," Scabior stated proudly as he walked up behind her. He examined the house rapidly. "Nice place," he breathed, trying to hide the sarcasm in his voice but it was still present.

"All it needs is a little care," she laughed as she lowered her wand, "and then it'll be perfect." She headed down the hall and opened a closet up. "Lumos," she stated and her wand lit up the dark, dusty closet. One by one, she pulled out multiple sweeping brooms, feather dusters, and rags. He cocked his head to the side a bit and she threw a feather duster at him. He caught it and let out a low chuckle.

"You think I'm going to clean, don't you?" he asked playfully. She flashed him a sweet smile as she rolled her eyes.

"Now why would we clean when we can use magic?" she asked back as she flicked her wand at the brooms and they sprang to life and started to sweep the floor. "Come on, just help me," she whispered as she moved closer to him.

"Alright, anything for my lovely," he murmured and her smile turned seductive. He turned away from her and went to work as she did the same. When they had finished the entryway, they moved to the dining room, then to the kitchen, and then to the living room. Scabior picked up an old picture in a frame and wiped it off with a rag. The picture was off a little girl that never seemed to suffer once in her life. He gazed at it for a long while and then looked to Sira. "Is this you, beautiful?" he asked as she stopped working and turned to him, her eyes puzzled. He showed her the picture and she gazed into his blue-grey eyes.

"Yes, it's me," she said softly. "Why do you ask?"

"You just look so 'appy and carefree," he sighed as he looked down at the picture again. "It's like I'm looking at a different person."

"I've been through a lot since then," she stated, "because I was six in that picture." She went over to another frame and dusted it off and took it to him. "Here's me at age four with my parents." He studied the picture, the woman in the photo looked almost precisely like Sira.

"Your mother looks exactly like you, beautiful," he uttered as she gazed at the picture. "Do you miss 'em?"

The question seemed to startle her; it caught her off-guard. Her eyes filled with her fear, he had never seen them look so child-like, so innocent. It was like she was supposed to be a different person then who she actually was. "Yeah, I miss them," she panted as she hugged the picture to her chest. "I barely got to know them and then they were gone from my life forever. They loved me so much, Scabior, and they never got to see me go to Hogwarts, they never got to help me on the train for the new school year, and they never got to welcome me back for the summer. They never got to help me choose a career, they never got to guide me through troubled times and they never got to see me grow and learn from my mistakes. They missed so much and they didn't have much time to be my parents and I didn't have much time to be their daughter." She strode away from him silently and placed the frame back its original position. He turned from her and set her picture down as he heard her footsteps leave the room.

As she climbed the staircase to the second floor, her fingers pulled a letter out of her pocket. Her memories weren't consuming her but all she felt was numbness. She needed to be alone. She reached the door to her parents' old bedroom and opened it. When she was little, she came here for comfort and, right now, she needed comforting. The door closed softly behind her as she went over to the bed and sat down on the edge. Dust covered everything in the room, just like the rest of the house. Her eyes gazed down at the old letter as she opened it and read it again for the first time since losing her first love.

Dear Sira,

I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I will always forgive you, no matter what you do, because you do everything with a reason. You never do anything for your own personal gain. You live to please, you live to love. You are with my life, Sira, and it's impossible to be angry with you. You are extraordinary and I hope you feel the same way about me.

Forever yours,  
Sirius

P.S. Turn around.

Tears rolled down her face as she thought of him, but mostly of how he wasn't there. She couldn't turn around and see him there standing, smiling at her. He wouldn't be there, he couldn't be there. Whenever she thought about him, she hurt with her guilt. She had hurt him so much and she had caused him so much pain that she would never forgive herself for it. Her body sank down on the bed, curling itself up into fetal position as her thoughts swirled in her head. Slowly, the memories wore her down, causing her eyes lids to grow heavy with her strain.

Grief, along with guilt and disgust, had worn her out, had made her feel so much older than what she actually was. She was only twenty-four and yet she experienced much more than anyone else she knew in the same amount of time. Her experiences had aged her, had changed her. Her blue eyes slowly grew duller as she stared at the wall across from her. She felt completely empty as she drew in a long breath. "Sirius," she sighed as a fresh wave of tears rolled off of her cheeks, "I miss you."

"Sira, are you alright, beautiful?" Scabior asked softly as he entered the room silently. His blue-grey eyes held his concern as he crossed the room to where she lay on the large bed. Her body lay there stiffly, as if she had been in the same position for hours. The sun had set, causing the room to darken.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she whispered as she wiped the tears from her eyes and sat up. He knew she was lying for he had heard her sobs earlier but what had concerned him was what she had said. He sat down on the edge beside her and gazed into her eyes, they were so fearful and unsure. Something had caught his attention, a letter sitting on the small nightstand beside the bed.

"You know you can tell me anything, my lovely," he breathed as she moved into his chest, her body telling her emotions.

"I know I can, Scabior," she exhaled softly, "but I just don't want to, right now." He ran his fingers through her hair as she rubbed her face on his shirt.

"I'll never force you to tell me," he whispered as she pulled back and he caressed her face with his hand. Her eyes seemed to grow more certain as they brightened. "You know that I'd never do something like that." She nodded a little and glanced at his eyes but quickly looked away. He could see her guilt; it was obvious and was causing her to become uncomfortable. He moved in close, waiting for her to be sure of herself as he gazed into her clear, blue eyes. Her mouth met his in a sweet kiss as her emotions that plagued her faded away.

"I know," she stated as she pulled away from her again. "I know you wouldn't." she stood and slowly walked out of the room, still hurting. He hated seeing her like this, in so much pain and so unsure. He had helped her through so much but there was still much that affected her, he never thought that she would be completely happy ever again.

His eyes found that letter again and he reached for it. He read it word for word, taking it all in and a storm of feelings flooded his mind. He thought that he would never be as good as Sirius was to her for it was obvious that she loved Sirius more than she loved him at times, but he wasn't angry with her. Sirius was a better man than what he could ever be. He loved her and he would forgive her for anything. He was there to support her when she fell and she was happy when she was with him. Scabior remembered her memories and he couldn't match Sirius, Sira could never love him as she had Sirius. She deserved better than him.

Sira, he whispered in his mind, I know you need me but you need better, you can do so much better. I know you love me and I know your past still 'urts you, just as my past pains me sometimes, but you need to move on. I'll be okay if you go, I'll be okay if you leave. All I want is for you to be 'appy and to be with a man that deserves someone was wonderful as you. You've made some mistakes but that doesn't change who you are deep within. Sirius saw who you are and so do I. I still love you but I don't want to 'old you back, I don't want it keep you from being 'appy, even if it means that I will suffer. I love you, Sira, and I will always love you.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

As they days passed, Sira's emotions steadied and her mind calmed with the help of Scabior. She noticed something though, something about him that concerned her. He seemed to have changed just a little, not much, but enough so she could see a difference. He was just a bit quieter, a bit more cautious around her and almost a bit somber, like he was in a mildly depressed state. She was finally happy in her parents' house again but he just seemed a little less than happy, he changed her good mood a little bit, but she never asked him what was wrong and just acted like nothing was amiss.

Other than Scabior's mood, everything was perfect. The house was cleaned and repaired and was in livable condition. It was spotless, too. She was joyous and she was doing what she had wanted to do for the longest time, she was living with Scabior in their own home, together as a couple. It made her feel complete, more complete than she had ever felt with him. She was actually living again, it seemed.

She stood at the window on the far wall of the living room, her blue eyes gazing out into the bright world. It was still cruel out there but at least, in here, she was safe. Her dark-brown hair was pulled back into a bun, all except for a few strands that hung on the sides on her flawless face. She wore a dress that was the color of light cream. The dress was her mother's, but it fit her like a glove. At the hollow of her neck, hung the necklace that Sirius gave her. Footsteps hit the hardwood floor as she turned to face the noise, the sunlight causing her hair to shimmer. "'ello, beautiful," Scabior breathed as she gave him an attractive smile. Her eyes gazed at him as she leaned against the window; he seemed to be back to normal. He slanted his head to the side. "Aren't you gonna come to me or do I 'ave to come to you?" he asked, his playfulness rich in his voice, it was even in his eyes. She shot him a smug look and crossed the room to him, where he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling them near to each other.

"I'll always come to you, Scabior," she said softly as she looked intently into his eyes. He let out a low, but soft and gentle, chuckle as he studied her.

"You know, I like the dress that you're wearing but I could do without the lace selves," he said, "and the length. It just seems like too much." She shot him a baffled look as her hands caressed his face. "You're still beautiful in it though. You're beautiful in everything."

"You better think that I'm beautiful in everything," she retorted lightheartedly. Her lips brushed against his and she felt his body relax with her touch. "If you didn't," she whispered, "I'd be concerned." She pulled away a little as his hand pressed against the back of her head. His mouth met hers as she leaned into him, wanting the closeness. His touch held his desire but it also held the feeling of satisfaction. Even now, even though she had felt his touch hundreds of times before, it sent a warm tingling through her skin. He pulled away and gazed into her eyes as his hand ran down her spine to her waist.

"I don't mean to be nosy or anything, lovely," he stated quietly, "but isn't tonight the night that you 'ave to be with the Death Eaters?" She nodded her head a little bit.

"Yeah," she sighed, "but I don't want to." He chuckled softly again as she dropped her eyes. "I know I have to though."

"You better not wear the dress then," he whispered into her ear as she shot him another puzzled look. He always seemed to surprise her. "You don't want it to be ruined, right?" She rolled her eyes as she flashed him a rambunctious smile as she dropped her hands from his face and pulled out of his arms. Longing flared in his eyes as she shook her head at him as she headed out of the room. She heard his footsteps follow her as she raced up the stairs, her hands gathering up her dress as she giggled lightly.

Once at the top of the stairs, she turned and went into her parents' room, their room. He arrived seconds later, throwing the door closed behind him, as she smiled at him. Her body turned away from him, so her back was to him, as she pulled the single clip holding her hair up out, allowing her hair to tumble down. She shook her head, causing her hair to gleam in the warm light. Her hand pulled her loose curls to the side as she turned her head to look at him over her shoulder, desire burning in her eyes.

He crossed the room to her and his lips automatically found the side of her neck. Her dress loosened slowly as Scabior undid the zipper. His arms pulled her body near to his as her hand reached back and touched the side of his face, weaving itself into his hair as she gradually threw her head back, allowing his mouth as much of her neck as it wanted. Her other hand found his arm at her waist and clung to it, gently tightening her grip on him. "Scabior," she panted as her heart pounded in her chest. He pulled her even closer to him with her words.

"Scabior," she hissed more urgently, causing him to reel back a little. She moved away from him and turned to look at him. "Now's not the time," she whispered as she headed over to her dresser and opened the middle drawer, "but tonight is." She smiled at him. "I promise." He nodded and turned away from her, looking defeated, as he moved from her.

The warm air of the night brushed through her hair as she strode alongside of one of her fellow Death Eaters. He was new and she had barely known him. All she really knew about what they had in common was that they had the same mission tonight. They were to look for the Order of the Phoenix as they arrived at the house that Harry Potter was being kept at and give the other Death Eaters a signal once they had the boy. Her blue eyes looked down the street to a sign that said 'Privet Drive.' They were both dressed in muggle clothing; she was wearing dark-wash jeans, black, leather boots, a blood-red tank top, and a black jacket. On her hip, her wand was perfectly concealed along with one of her knives. She wore all of her knives, just in case.

She glanced at her partner for this mission. He was older, the age of most of the other Death Eaters, and had short, brown hair and brown eyes that she described as the color of mud. He wore jeans, too, but of a lighter was and a black t-shirt. "This is the street," she muttered as they both stopped walking. He looked at her quickly and then scanned the surroundings for anything.

"It should be about time," he whispered as she looked into the dying light behind her. The sun was just about to set. She shifted quickly into a wolf and gazed up at her partner until he started walking down the drive, she followed beside him with a gliding stride. As soon as they neared the house, she trotted into the yard, looking like a happy-go-lucky dog on a stroll. She circled the house, searching for the best place to wait until the Order arrived. She slunk into the thick bushes, hiding quickly and quietly in the leaves.

The sun was just a thin line on the horizon when figures of people formed in the front yard. From what she could tell, there were thirteen of them. Then they popped into view as their Disillusionment Charms lifted, she knew most of them. There was Hagrid on a black motorcycle with a side car attached to it, Mr. Weasley, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Mundungus Fletcher, Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Fred and George Weasley, and Mad-Eye Moody. The other two, she didn't know, it looked like another Weasley and she had no clue who the girl was. They all headed quickly to the door. Please don't let Moody see me, she thought. Please don't let him see me. He'll blow my cover, I'll be exposed.

She tried not to focus on Moody as he led the group to the house. Tonks went over to Remus, taking him by the hand and gazing at him with a look that said that she was in love with him. Sira knew that they were married now, because of the Death Eater meeting. They all filed into the house and, once the door close, she backed out of the bushes. She threw her head back and barked three times, loudly and staccato, and then howled.

Her eyes watched the sky, waiting for the signal her partner was supposed to send into the sky at her call. She waited but it never came. Her hackles rose as her lips curled into a snarl. Idiot! She growled in her mind. Rapidly, she shifted from wolf to human and drew her want from her hip. Her grip on her wand was deadly as she raised it straight into the air, sending a ball of green sparks shooting up into the sky. The first part of her task was done, now all she had to do was search the house after they left.

The quicker we get this over with, the better, she snarled to herself as she shifted back into a wolf. Her body sank down onto the ground as she watched the house, furious and disgusted. Her thoughts turned to Scabior. She sighed as she thought of him; of the way he would hold her and the way he would support her. She wanted to be with him for the rest of her life and she knew that he felt the same but they agreed to wait on their marriage. It wasn't the only thing she wanted; she also wanted to be done with the war so she could spend as much time as possible doing the things she wanted to do.

She had lost her desire to fight and now she had new desires. To her, she felt like she no longer needed to fight and she had no real fire to go and risk her life for a cause that she finally realized that she didn't really care about. She didn't care if purebloods had the rule over the muggles or other magical beings. She didn't care about striking down anyone who stood in her way to receive what she wanted. Being a Death Eater seemed almost pointless to her right now. It didn't make any sense. At least she had Scabior, that was all that really mattered to her.

Then her thoughts shifted to Cal and Lark. She didn't want to admit it but she was jealous of what they shared. It was a perfect relationship and they were perfect for each other. They loved each other the exact same, they supported each other, and, most importantly, they made each other's lives so much better. They had a life planned out and soon, they would be sharing it together, until death do they part. They were to be wed on the eighth of August, less than two weeks away.

Her attention returned to the house as the door opened and people started filing out of the house. Only, now there was fourteen people and seven of them where Harry Potter. She let out a low snarl as she watched then head to their brooms or thestrals or, in Hagrid's and one Potter's case, the motorcycle. She knew that there was only one Harry and the other six were imposters. Out of the seven Potters, one was Fred, one was George, one was Hermione, one was Ron, one was Mundungus, and one was that girl that she saw earlier. Then, once they were all ready, they were off into the sky, off into the night.

A howl cut through the air, her howl. She cried to the moon, crying the start of the mission and the coming of the end of it. Her hackles rose straight up as a shiver went down her spine. Her words to Harry last year echoed in her mind. She wished him to be safe and yet, she wanted all of this to end. Good luck, Harry, she thought. Let no one be harmed tonight and, if you are captured tonight, come quietly. It's the only thing we can do. She shifted back into a human and walked out onto the sidewalk. She looked around, searching for her partner and she found him.

Rage filled her and she sprinted toward shim, he was walking away, trying to have nothing to do with what just happened. "HEY!" she barked as she stopped. He turned towards her, fear entering his eyes. "Where were you?" she asked in a growl as her eyes grew wild with her fire. "You were supposed to give the signal!"

"I-."

"The signal was three barks, evenly spaced and exactly, exactly the same, followed by a long howl," she snarled murderously. "How you miss that?"

"I didn't hear it," he mumbled as he dropped his eyes from hers.

"You liar!" she shrieked. "The whole block could hear it! You know what the Dark Lord will do to you? You will be punished and, just so you know, the Dark Lord hates liars." He looked stunned, as if he had just made a big mistake. She was livid and in disbelief that someone so new was so unwilling to serve the Dark Lord. "Just for that go complete our mission by yourself." He didn't say a word as he walked towards her, his head hung low. As he walked past her, she threw her chin up and vanished from the spot, still in total disbelief. She knew the Dark Lord would not be angry with her but he would be angry with his new Death Eater.

Her hand turned the door knob and pushed open the door of her house. She closed it behind her and leaned against it. She sighed as she calmed herself down. Once she was, she rubbed her face with her hands and slowly walked down the hall. Her footsteps were soft but still sharp on the hardwood floors. She treaded up the stairs and turned to go into her and Scabior's bedroom.

Finally, she started to wonder where he was as she opened the door to see him standing beside the bed with his shirt in his hands. He looked at her and smiled as she crossed the room to him, placing her hands on his bare chest as her longing burned in her eyes. She needed something good tonight for how her part of the mission went. Slowly, she slipped her jacket off of her shoulders and let it fall to the ground. Her breaths became deep as he held her in his arms, stroking her hair, and gazing longingly at her.

"Oh, Scabior," she breathed as her lips brushed against his neck as her hands cupped his face, running from his hairline to his jaw. He had a little bit of stubble on his face, he needed to shave again. His lips met hers quickly as her hands weaved into his hair. His kiss held his burning desire but he held himself back, unsure if she really wanted to do this right now. He pulled away and looked into her eyes.

"I hope you don't mind the stubble, beautiful," he whispered. She smiled at him provocatively as she continued to gaze at him. Her hands ran down his neck to his chest to his lower abdominal muscles, just above his pants.

"Scabior, I don't mind," she hissed seductively. "No, not at all." Her smile widened as her lips started to kiss his neck. He pulled her closer and she let out a little laugh, a little laugh that held her pleasure and her wanting. She needed him right now, he was all she needed.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Bacon sizzled in the pan as Sira's blue eyes watched it cook carefully. She hated over-cooked bacon; it just seemed to lose its flavor and became too dry. With a flick of her wand, she flipped each strip over, satisfied with her work, and grabbed a few pieces of toast and buttered them rapidly. Footsteps came into the kitchen and came up slowly behind her. "Good morning, my lovely," Scabior whispered into her ear as his hands placed themselves on her hips. She smiled and put down the toast.

"Good morning," she breathed back. "Breakfast is almost ready; just let me take off this last pan of bacon." Scabior looked at the plateful of already-made bacon and gave her a puzzled look.

"Are we going to be feeding an army this morning?" he asked as she moved the last of the bacon onto the pile. She let out a little laugh as she shook her head.

"You can't have too much bacon," she said happily as she set the plate on the kitchen table. "Can you get the toast?" He let out a chuckle as he picked up another plate and handed it to her. He was behind her again, wrapping his arms around her as if to never let her go or to protect her from anything that could ever harm her.

"So what are your plans for today?" he asked as he rested his head on hers.

"Other than eating all of this bacon and being with you?" she questioned with a cocky smile.

"Other than that," he said back proudly.

"Well," she sighed as she released herself from his arms, "I need to tell the Dark Lord about one of his newest Death Eater's performance last night." She sank down in the chair, which she was standing behind. "He was awful and he didn't even seem to want to be there. I was shocked because, usually, the newest are the most willing to do the task that he assigns them." She grabbed a piece of toast and threw it on her plate. "I mean how hard is it to hear three barks and a howl?"

"That was the signal?" Scabior asked in disbelief as he sat down in the chair to her right. "'ow could 'e not 'ear something like that?"

"That's what I thought," she growled. "You can't possibly miss that." Unknowingly, she shoved a large bite of toast in her mouth before she realized what she was doing. "Sorry," she mumbled as she dropped her eyes into her lap, embarrassed by her action, especially since Scabior was there. Her cheeks reddened as he gazed at her longingly.

"You don't 'ave to be sorry, beautiful," he whispered seductively as her eyes returned to his, hers showing her love and her care for him, his showing his understanding and his desire. "You never 'ave to be sorry."

The feeling of Scabior's arm around her shoulders felt so good and relaxing to her as they stood at the threshold of the Malfoy Manor. Sira had told Scabior that he didn't have to come with her but he insisted to. He would go wherever she went and she would do the same for him. She couldn't stand to be away from him, he made her feel oaky again, comfortable with herself. Her eyes gazed at him, thinking of how lucky she actually was to have a man like him.

The door of the house opened for them to see Lucius standing in the doorway, his cold, grey eyes fixed on Sira, studying her as he tried to hide his craving for her. she looked at him, Scabior's arm still around her shoulders, as she tilted her head to the side a little, trying to keep herself as calm as possible. Scabior knew of her and Lucius, he had seen her memories. His face hardened with his disgust towards Lucius and his hand clenched on Sira's arm, as if to tell Lucius that she was his, no one else's. Lucius' attention shifted to Scabior and they started to glare at each other, ready to throw a punch at the other if needed. Sira couldn't decide whether she should smile because of their silent battle or be fearful.

"Lucius," she said flatly, "this is-."

"Scabior," Lucius finished in a vicious snarl, "your fiancé." Scabior stood up a little straighter and put his chin up a bit into the air, giving him a more powerful and yet cocky appearance. She could see the hatred burning in Scabior's blue-grey eyes as he stared at Lucius. "It's nice to see you again, Sira," he said, a bit kinder, as he focused on her, "all happy and carefree with your fiancé who doesn't deserve a woman as wonderful as you are."

"That means a lot," Scabior growled, his voice thick with his sarcasm, "'specially coming from a man like yourself."

"Strong word for a petty thief," Lucius hissed icily as he focused on Scabior.

"At least this 'petty thief' is a better man than you are," Scabior retorted smoothly as his free hand clenched at his side and his grip on Sira tightened.

"I doubt that," Lucius spat with a cruel laugh. "You're not even a Death Eater."

"I may not be a Death Eater, Mr. Malfoy," he growled as Sira looked up into his face to see it coated with anger, "but the Dark Lord 'as more faith in me than 'e does in you." A muscle in Lucius' jaw twitched as he fought the urge to snarl. He was disgusted with the choice that Sira made; the choice of selecting Scabior over him. "And I'm more loyal to 'im and, most importantly, I'm more loyal to the ones I love."

Then, Lucius looked as if he was slapped in the face and then there was a long silence. They stood, not speaking, just glaring into each other's eyes. Scabior kept his composure, not ever fading or slipping up against Lucius. He was stronger and more determined than Lucius would ever be, and he was also more protective.

"Lucius," she whispered as her eyes softened and she gazed at him, "I need to speak with the Dark Lord." His attention shifted from Scabior to her as the look in his eyes changed. He moved to the side of the doorway and allowed her into the house. As she walked down the hall, she heard the shuffle of feet and the slamming of the door.

It didn't take long before she felt a chill run through her body, the chill that always told her of the presence of the Dark Lord. "Volkov," his cold voice said, filling her ears with her name. She turned to face him but he was already standing in front of her.

"My Lord," she said kindly as she bowed low to him. His red eyes fixed on her blue ones as she stood up, straight and proud, and looked back at him, her eyes calm. "I need to speak with you about the mission the other night."

"Volkov," he hissed, silencing her, "I do not wish to speak of the failure that occurred the other night. We will never speak of it again. It was a series of mistakes that should not have even happened." His evil, snake-like face was blank but his eyes showed his disgust. She shook her head at him slowly.

"I do not wish to speak about the mission, my Lord," she stated proudly, "but about my partner during the mission, about his performance." A dark smile grew across his face as he focused even more carefully on her.

"Really?" he growled icily, sending a shiver down her spine. "Your partner told me that you did not do your part, the part that I personally assigned to you." Rage flared in her chest, causing her eyes to flicker with her old fire.

"My Lord-," she breathed as the fire in her eyes grew brighter but the Dark Lord raised his hand, signaling her to quiet.

"He told me only lies, Volkov," he said flatly. "He never spoke one word of truth to me about your or his performance during the task. He spoke that you did absolutely nothing but it was he that did nothing, wasn't it?" She nodded as her answer. "You had to carry his weight and complete the task alone. He will be punished severely for going against orders and lying to me while you will be rewarded for your honesty and your dedication."

"Thank you, my Lord," she said softly as the fire left her eyes.

"And I trust that you will be ready for another task," he hissed as she gave him a baffled look. "I will give you details later, my little wolf, but I will tell you that, soon, the Ministry of Magic will belong to the Death Eaters and you will be one of the very few that brought it to its demise. I know you will serve me well."

"Yes, my Lord," she whispered as she bowed again and he turned and headed away from her. With a turn on her heel, she headed out of the house the way she had come, her footsteps echoing off of the walls.

As she reached the door, it opened for her to see Lucius limping into the house. His white-blond hair was in a disarray, worse than it was when he was in Azkaban and some of it was red… blood-red. Her eyes grew wide as he dropped his hand from his face. The hand was covered in blood as he looked at it, his eyes and his face shadowed by his hair. "Lucius," she exhaled, shocked to see him in that state.

His head snapped up to look in her direction and she was horrified at what she saw. Around his right eyes, a dark circle was forming, causing his eye to become swollen gradually. Bruises bloomed all over his face, coming in black and blue. Blood streamed down his chin from his swollen lip, which was split open, but for Sira, the worst thing was the look in his eyes. It was a look of helplessness mixed hate. He didn't say anything to her and then soon walked away, trying to mop up the blood on his face with his hand. She gave him one last fleeting look and stepped out of the house.

Her blue eyes found Scabior in an instant after she closed the door behind her. He had a triumphant smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes, showing his victory. She rushed up to him, her face showing her astonishment and also her fear. "Scabior," she panted lightly as she looked at him, "what did you do?" He scoffed and put his arm around her shoulders and led her away from the house.

"I taught 'im a little lesson," he said cockily, "and, luckily, 'e learned very quickly." She shook her head, not knowing if she should scold him or just let it go. She thought that it would be better to just let it go. Her body moved closer to his as they walked down the walkway, heading towards the gates of the manor. Her mind wandered to the words that the Dark Lord had told her, wondering about what she would be doing. Her stomach churned with a feeling of excitement. The feeling brought a smile to her face; she was ready for whatever it was. She wanted it. She longed for it.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The time had come, the time that Sira had been waiting impatiently for. She had been ready for this very day ever since the Dark Lord had told her that she was going on this extremely important task, one that would make the Ministry of Magic belong to him. She was eager to fulfill the task, she didn't know why but her enthusiasm made her anxious. Something within her was tempting her with the possibility of battle, causing her to become even more excited. Her confidence lifted her spirits, actually making her long for combat. She felt that, this time, everything would go as planned.

The sound of her black stilettos hitting the stone floor echoed off the walls of the Atrium of the Ministry of Magic. Her dark-brown hair was pulled back in a tight bun except for a few strands that framed her lovely face. A black hat, wide-brimmed but elegant, sat crooked on her head, tilted to the side and shadowing her face. Her dress only went to her mid-thigh and was strapless. Its color was a gorgeous and rich purple and it had a black belt to accentuate her waist. It was way too revealing compared to what she normally wore but she felt beautiful in it, striking and confident.

All eyes were on her as she walked towards the fountain. She was stunning and she walked as if she knew she was. Soon, her eyes found who she was looking for and a small smile grew on her face. "Good day, Yaxley," she said politely as she approached him. The gazes hadn't fallen from her; actually, they were stronger than ever. His attention shifted to her as she tilted her head a little.

"Good day, miss," he said carefully, knowing not to say her name for she was still a wanted criminal, she had already seen at least one wanted poster of herself. "Follow me, please." She nodded to him and they set off towards the lifts. Everyone's gazes were suspicious of them but she didn't care, she was on a mission.

Yaxley led her through the Ministry until they reached a dark, empty corridor. Sira hadn't seen anyone in a while, it was like this section of the building wasn't used or was rarely used. He soon came to a halt and she did the same as she looked at him, her eyes serious and determined. "So what's the plan?" she asked in barely a whisper. He gave her a shocked look as if he didn't know what she was talking about. "You do have a plan, right?"

"No, I thought that you had a plan," he stated flatly. "He told me that you would be leading this mission."

"He never told me anything about me leading the mission," she growled softly as her eyes filled with her agitation, "but here's what we'll do. Let's try to find anyone that could help us from the Death Eaters. Do you know of any here?"

"Yes," he stated proudly, "Macnair is here today."

"Good, go get him as I form a plan," she said in a soft hiss. "It won't take long."

Her mind raced as she leaned up against the wall, lost in trying to form a plan. All she could think of was getting a meeting with the Minister… alone. She didn't know how to get the meeting or how to get him alone but she was sure that it was what she had to do. Soon, she heard footsteps and her head snapped to the source of the sound. Yaxley and Macnair were heading to her. "Yaxley," she said quickly, "do you think that we could set up a meeting with the Minister?" Confusion filled both men's eyes; they looked at her like she was insane.

"It would be extremely difficult," he stated, showing no emotion. She raised her chin in the air and started to walk away from them. They were baffled by her behavior; she was acting like there was no danger at all to this.

"Give me a half of an hour, if I don't come back here in that time or you do not hear news of my success," she called to them as she walked away, "expect the worst and complete the task without me." She vanished into the darkest part of the corridor while Yaxley and Macnair exchanged glances. Then, a cackle of dark laughter broke through the murkiness.

"How may I help you, miss?" a young man at a desk she stood before asked. She looked at him, studying him. He had black hair and hazel eye and, most importantly, didn't seem to recognize her. A sweet smile formed on her lips as her eyes softened.

"Yes, I would like to speak with the Minister of Magic," she said politely, trying to seem as thoughtful as possible.

"I'm sorry but the Minister isn't meeting with anyone today," he said monotonously. "You'll have to come back tomorrow." She nodded her head and walked to the side of his desk and then sat on the edge of it as she crossed her legs. He watched her, unable to hide the sudden desire for her that shone in his eyes. He was fairly handsome, which made this easy for her.

"Are you sure that there's nothing you can do for me?" she asked as she touched his face. He flinched with her touch, as if it burned, and then relaxed into it. Her smile grew wider; she had him right where she wanted him. "This is very, very important." His hand reached for her knee, pausing a bit before it touched her as if he was afraid that she would jerk away. She didn't move and allowed him to touch her.

"I'll see what I can do," he breathed as he stood. She continued to smile at him as she fluttered her eyelashes as he raced away from her, obviously not wanting to keep her waiting. She slid off the desk, impressed with herself for accomplishing such a feat in such a quick time. Before she knew it, the young man was back and had a smile on his face. She tilted her head down a little and looked up at him, all to see the desire flare brighter in his eyes.

"He'll see you now; miss, if you'll follow me." She nodded and walked with the man down the hall he had just came from, constantly gazing at him with a false longing in her eyes. He was always looking at her, as if baffled by her. She could see his wanting for her in his eyes and she could see his puzzlement with her. He didn't know what to think about her.

"Here we are," he said once they reached a large door, which he opened for her. She gave him a small bow as a thank you and walked into the office. She saw him instantly, the Minister of Magic, Rufus Scrimgeour. He looked up at her as she walked towards the desk he was sitting behind.

"Sit down please, miss," he said as he motioned to a chair to the right of her. No one else was in the office. How lucky can I get? She asked herself as she fought the oncoming urge to smile. "Now, what did you need to discuss with me?"

"I need to discuss the Death Eaters with you, Minister," she said quickly, making herself sound nervous for his well-being. "There is a plot out, a plot that would overthrow the Ministry and bring it to its knees and allow the Dark Lord to be in complete and total control of it." He studied her as she spoke. To him, her voice sounded familiar and the parts of her face, that he could see, seemed familiar as well.

"I'm glad that you have informed me of this, miss," he said as he tried to hide the suspicion in his voice, "but where did you get your information?"

"I would rather not say," she mumbled as she dropped her eyes, shielding even more of her face. She sensed that he was trying to figure out who she was. Her hand slowly reached for and drew her wand.

"If you won't tell me where you got your information, then can you please remove your hat?" he asked but it sounded, to her, more like an order. She did as she was told and removed it slowly and then looked him directly in the eye. "Sira Volkov," he growled as he recognized her instantly. Do it now! Something within her screamed.

"Avada Kedavra!" she barked as she aimed her want at his heart. There was a burst of green light and then the Minister fell to the floor behind his desk. Time to go! The voice within her cried. She turned as she put her hat back on and raced out of the office. She burst through the doors, running through the crowd of people just outside of it and sprinted back the way she had come. A cry welled up in the air. They knew what had happened.

"STOP HER! STOP THE ASSASIN!" a deep, male voice bellowed but it didn't slow her down. Everybody was closing in on her, trying to capture her, but she was too quick for them.

A shot of pain went up her arm as she skidded to stop. The hall was a dead end. "Stay where you are!" someone barked at her. Fear filled her as her mind raced to find a solution. She was trapped and she was about to be captured. If she didn't act fast, she would be sent back to Azkaban. She turned to her would-be capturers and smiled at them, knowing what she had to do. With a crack, she vanished from the spot.

Sira appeared in the chaos of the Death Eater attack on the Order of the Phoenix in attempt to capture Harry Potter at a wedding. Flashes of light filled the air as she rushed into the fray, throwing her hat off her head as she ran. Tables were scattered everywhere and chairs were thrown aside as the fighting soon became more vicious. Harry wasn't there anymore; at least, she didn't think he was.

Nymphadora Tonks defeated the Death Eater she was dueling and raced to Sira, not knowing who she was charging at. "Hello, Tonks," Sira said politely as if she was talking to an old friend… well, she was talking to an old friend. "It's nice to see you again." Tonks glared at her and sent a stunning spell in her direction, aimed perfectly at her heart. Sira dodged it easily. "I heard that you and Remus are married now, is this true?" Tonks' eyes filled with her rage.

"Don't you mock him, Volkov!" she barked. "We used to care about you!" Sira let out a little laugh, a little, cruel laugh, as she shot a spell at Tonks, her wand flashing like a sword.

"I'm not mocking anyone," she hissed back. "I'm just congratulating you." This comment made Tonks furious and every move she made showed her anger. Her battle became fiercer and Sira could barely keep up. They fought harder than any other person there. Tonks wanted Sira dead, she had done so much wrong and she never changed her way even though she could. She hated her for that; she hated her for making everyone suffer.

"Fall back!" someone shouted but Tonks didn't stop fighting, nor did anyone else, Order member or Death Eater. The Death Eaters were gaining the upper hand, it wasn't much of an advantage but it was one. Then, Sira saw the chance to defeat Tonks. She was distracted.

"Stupefy!" Sira barked as Tonks' eyes grew wide and she was sent flying back a few feet. She hit a fallen table and Sira turned to see all the other Order members looking at her as they continued their duels.

Suddenly, she felt the tip of a wand underneath her chin, digging into her flesh as someone held her still. Her hands wrapped around her attacker's wrist as she threw her head back, breathing hard. Only one thought went through her mind, if she died right here, right now, what would Scabior do without her? "Sira Volkov," her attacker whispered into her ear, his voice low and dangerous, "the murderer of so many and the destroyer of all lives, how nice it is to finally meet you. I've heard much about you, they say you shouldn't be trusted. They say you would kill anyone you laid eyes upon. Only, all I see is a helpless girl with a wand at her throat, not a dangerous killer."

"All you Order members are the same," she hissed coldly as she struggled against his grip, "all you believe is that you can change me."

"Not anymore, Miss Volkov," he laughed, a bloodlust flaring in his voice. "Not after you killed your friend. We no longer see you as a harmless girl who has made many mistakes. We see you for who you are. A vicious, cold-blooded killer."

"Good," she spat, "I might as well be what everyone thinks I am!" Her blue eyes filled with her rage. "So are you going to take me from this world? Are you going to my life?" He let out a merciless laugh.

"No, but I might as well," he growled into her ear as she fought his grip again, testing him. "It would be so easy." Then, a jet of light, a stunning spell, which was aimed and intended for her, hit her attacker. She was released from his grip when he fell to the ground and she sprinted towards the chaos. As she reached them, the Order members started to disappear with soft pops. She locked eyes with Remus Lupin just before he disappeared with his still-stunned wife. The look in his eyes said that he was angry with her for what she did but it seemed to her that everybody hated her. She didn't care.

Soon, all of the Order members were gone and only Death Eaters remained. She let out a sigh as she pulled a chair out of a pile of wreckage and sat down on it, crossing her legs as she looked at her fellow Death Eaters. "Well," she exhaled, "what to do now? There's no one to fight and the Ministry has fallen." They gave her puzzled looks, as if they thought that she was truly insane. "So, are we going to just stay here or are were going home? We had a successful night, I'm pretty sure our job is done and there's not much more that could be done, except for finding the Potter boy."

"We already sent two of our own after him," the familiar voice of Mulciber said flatly.

"Good," she stated as she stood from her seat. She walked away from all of them as if she was the leader of them and she picked up her hat when she reached it. The Death Eaters were baffled by her; she didn't care what anyone thought of her for she only cared about what she thought of herself. Now, she thought that she had finally healed from the wounds that Sirius had left her. Of course, sometimes they would reopen but Scabior would always be there to tend to them, to heal her and it was all she needed.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The days before Cal's wedding were limited and the deadline was quickly approaching. Soon, it would her wedding day and Sira was busy setting up for it. She was in charge of everything from flowers to food, from dresses to colors, and from guests to setup. Of course, Cal had the final say for all decisions and she accepted them… well, most of them.

"No!" Cal barked angrily at Scabior with rage in her ice-blue eyes. "We are not putting eight chairs at each table!"

"Why not? We could 'ave more people at each table that way," Scabior growled back," and we would need less tables."

"I don't care! It's going to be too crowded with eight people!" she snapped. "I'm the bride and it's going to be done my way!" They were both furious, wanting each other to suffer.

"You know, Cal," he snarled coldly, "you always asked why I left you and, guess what, this is why. You always try to control everything." Cal looked like she just wanted to slap him as hard as she could.

"Well, I'm not marrying you," she stressed, "and I was going to dump you anyways!"

"Like I would care!" Scabior spat. Sira stopped what she was doing, putting tablecloths on all of the tables, and turned to face them.

"HEY!" Sira barked, causing them to stop glaring at each other and look at her. "We need to get working because tomorrow is the big day and there's plenty left to do and we don't need to be bickering about little things! So stop acting so immature and help me!" They both gave her a stunned look, a look that said that they were surprised that she was taking control of the situation.

"But this is important," Cal growled, trying to hide the irritation in her voice.

"No, it's not, so decide and move onto something else," Sira spat as she returned to putting tablecloths on tables. Once she said that, they started their pettifoggery again, Cal wanting six chairs and Scabior wanting eight. Sira was trying to keep calm but they had been at it like that for the last four days and she had enough. "Okay, since you can't decide," she stated loudly, "we're going to flip a coin!"

"Fine," Scabior barked unhappily as he continued to glare at Cal.

"Fine," Cal mocked him, causing his blue-grey eyes to become more agitated. She walked over to them.

"Scabior, call it," Sira said as she fished a galleon out of her pocket.

"Why does he get to-?"

"CAL! I've had enough of this!" Sira barked. "Scabior's calling it!"

"Heads," he stated proudly as Sira flipped the coin. It fell to the ground, clattering on the wood of the dance floor.

"Tails," Sira said flatly and Cal shrieked with laughter. Scabior's face hardened with his defeat as he gazed angrily at the coin, willing it to actually be heads. "Now, you two go and put six chairs around each table." Cal walked off happily, obviously enjoying her victory over him as he walked away, murmuring something icily under his breath. Sira shook her head as she returned to her work.

She didn't know that setting up a wedding would be that much work and would cause her that much stress. Sira was just glad that they already had the location of the actual ceremony set up and all they had to do was get the finishing touches done on the area where the reception would take place. Only, that was taking longer than she expected because of the bickering. There was so little to do but it was still a lot. Sira was just ready for it to be over with and her stress to be done and, tomorrow, it would be.

The guests started to arrive at the Malfoy Manor an hour before the wedding was planned to begin. Sira was busy getting herself and everyone else ready. Right now, she was fixing her make-up one last time and pulling back her hair into a messy bun as she thought of everything that needed to be done. After she was done with herself, she needed to check on everyone else. As she took a few steps back, she examined herself in a mirror. Her dress was pretty but elegant, light blue, and it was knee length. Satisfaction filled her as she looked at herself, she was going to be a good maid of honor for her friend and that fact made all the stress worth it.

"Sira," someone said softly and her head snapped in the direction of the sound to see Narcissa standing in the doorway of the room, wearing the same dress as her for she was a bridesmaid, "do I look okay?"

"Yes, Narcissa," she said, quickly examining her, "you look beautiful."

"Thanks," she said gently with a little smile, "but Bellatrix isn't happy about the dress." Sira let out a soft laugh, gentle and kind.

"I didn't think she would," she said confidently. "How are the others? Are we almost ready to start?"

"Everyone else is fine and I think we're just about ready," Narcissa stated.

"How's Cal?" she asked, hoping that her friend wasn't too worried about today for everything was going smoothly so far. Narcissa shrugged and Sira sighed. "I better go check on her."

"Cal," Sira breathed as she opened the door to the room in the Malfoy Manor where Cal was getting ready in. "Are you okay?" She heard gentle sobs and rushed into the room to comfort her friend. "Cal, what's wrong?" She kneeled beside her friend, who was sitting in a chair, and took Cal's hands in hers, her blue eyes gazing up into her face with concern.

"It's just that everything's not going perfectly, Sira," Cal sobbed to her. "Everything's wrong."

"Everything is just as you wanted it," she said softly. "Everything is going fine, we are on time and we're almost ready and soon, nothing will matter to you other than the man standing before you, the love of your life standing before you, as you go to him and are joined together for life. No one, nothing will matter, other than him. So, Cal, only worry about Lark and let me worry about the rest." Cal smiled and the tears stopped streaking down her face.

"Thanks, Sira," she whispered, "you're such a good friend."

"Everyone, take your places," Sira called as she and a group of people stood at the entrance of the Malfoy Manor. They moved and prepared themselves to walk out of the house. She checked everyone over, making sure that they were perfect, with one exception of Bellatrix not being happy. Then, Sira saw someone she wished that she would never see again, the young guard from Azkaban that drug her through the prison when she arrived there.

"Are you the maid of honor, Sira Volkov?" he asked arrogantly as she straightened his blue tie that was the same color as her dress. She gazed up into his eyes with a baffled look.

"Yes, are you the best man?" she asked, really hoping that he wasn't. He smiled at her and her heart plummeted.

"Yes and let me introduce myself," he said proudly. "I'm Seth and I'll force you to walk down that aisle with me if I have to."

"Too bad that I'm going to walk down it willingly," she hissed softly, "because I'm sure that you would love to tackle me again for trying to escape." The smile grew on his face, the arrogant, cocky smile.

"I'm sure that you'd love it too," he said darkly, it was barely a whisper, but his words sent a chill through her.

"I'm engaged," she spat, trying hard to cover her disgust. The smile was wiped off of his face with her words.

"To who?"

"I'll let you guess," she breathed, her voice sassy, as they started to walk out of the house. She held a bouquet of flowers in her hands as she interlocked arms with Seth. Everything was beautiful once they approached the location that the wedding as taking place at. The grove of trees that they choose for it on lawn of the manor looked amazing. The colors of the wedding went perfectly with the surrounding, light greens, light blues, and light yellows. It was perfect in every way. All eyes were upon them as they headed slowly down the aisle; she couldn't help the beautiful smile that bloomed on her face. It was a little odd though, on one side sat mostly Death Eaters and on the other sat mostly guards from Azkaban. Her eyes locked with Scabior's, he was sitting in the second row from the front and on the side she was going to be standing on.

Something within her heart fluttered, as if she felt that Scabior should be standing up there on the altar and she should be coming to wed him. Soon, she unlocked arms with Seth and headed to stand beside Bellatrix as they waited for Cal to walk down the aisle. Scabior smiled at her, he though she was beautiful and stunning up there and he had the same longing in his heart as she did, he just didn't know that she was feeling the same.

Then, a boy and a girl walked in, the ring bearer and the flower girl. The ring bearer had dark, chocolate-brown hair and dark-blue eyes, almost the color of sapphires and he wore a little tuxedo with a light yellow tie. The flower girl wore a yellow dress and she had caramel-brown hair and dark-green eyes. As she walked, she dropped flower petals from the basket she was carrying. Sira glanced over to where Lark stood. He was smiling as he caught sight of his bride ready to walk down the aisle. He was anxious to see her. He wore a handsome tuxedo with a soft yellow tie, he looked well-put together and better than Sira had ever seen him.

Everyone stood simultaneously as Cal stepped into the aisle. She was lovely, stunning and all eyes were on her but hers were only on Lark, holding her desire and her wanting. A smile blossomed on her lips as she walked gracefully towards him. Her dress was snow-white with very light yellow embroidery, gemstones glittered on the top of the dress and there was an intertwining pattern on the train. Her veil tumbled down her back, not covering her face. In her hands was a bouquet of white and yellow roses and daisies. Everything about her was breath-taking.

She reached the alter where she stood, facing Lark with the smile still on her face and the glittering still in her eyes. All took their seats again. "Ladies and gentleman," an older wizard said proudly, "we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of Lark Blackwood and Calypso in holy matrimony." Sira looked at Lark, he seemed to not even be there, and he was lost in Cal's eyes. Nothing else in the world mattered to them. Tears rimmed Sira's eyes as she looked at them, they deserved to have a long and joyous life together.

"Please join hands," the wizard said softly as Cal turned to Sira, handing over her bouquet to her as Sira gave her a little smile of reassurance. Cal turned back to Lark with a little nod of her head. "Do you, Lark Blackwood, take Calypso as your lawfully wedded wife, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, for sickness or for health, until death do you part?" Lark's smile grew as his emerald eyes glittered with his answer.

"I do," he said tenderly.

"Do you, Calypso," the wizard ask, "take Lark Blackwood as your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, for sickness or for health, until death do you part?"

"I do," Cal said her voice full of her emotions.

"By the power vested in me," the wizard stated proudly, "I declare you bonded for life." The wizard raised his wand above their heads, sending silver stars showering down around them as their lips met in a kiss. A tear rolled down Sira's cheek as she looked at Scabior, her wanting growing brighter in her eyes. He smiled back at her as the applause filled the air. Lark and Cal parted and she turned to Sira, a sweet smile on her face, and Sira gave back her flowers.

Everyone stood again, still clapping, as Cal and Lark walked down the aisle together, beaming with their joy. Soon, Sira walked down from the alter and met Seth. She walked away with him but her eyes were gazing at Scabior the whole time. It was as if Scabior was the only thing that she had ever wanted, that nothing could ever compare to him. She wanted to marry him; she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Everyone was chatting with each other as Sira and Scabior arrived at the location that the reception of Cal's wedding. Everything looked gorgeous, elegant, and yet simple. Daisies and roses were all over the setting along with a beautiful, almost mesh-like, fabric that was the colors of green, blue, and yellow, giving the entire place a soft appearance. Food was placed ornately on a group of long tables that lined one side of the canopy-covered area, looking sophisticated.

Scabior gazed down at her as she looked up at him with a little smile on her face and desire in her eyes. He led her to an empty table in the far corner, away from everyone. He pulled out a chair for her and she took it gladly, watching him the entire time. He stood behind her as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck gently. His lips tingled her skin and the sensation caused her to giggle.

"Everyone," Cal's voice called, "please take a seat." They did as they were told; even Scabior did so, sitting himself right next to Sira with his arm around her shoulders. Sira thought that she and Scabior would be alone but she thought to soon for Lucius, Narcissa, and Draco Malfoy came and sat at their table. She felt Scabior stiffen and his grip on her tightened. Scabior was protective of her and Sira glad that he was. She watched Lucius carefully, noticing that his jaw tightened shut at the sight of them. At least he didn't show the signs of Scabior's lesson on his face.

"Also," Cal said, drawing the attention back to her, "Lark and I would like to thank you all for coming today and sharing this special occasion with us. We appreciate all of your support and we just wanted to thank you for it. Now, we welcome you to a lunch so please help yourself." Cal turned to Sira, looking directly at her and she headed towards her. Sira gave Scabior a look saying, 'don't do anything you might regret,' as she rose from her chair.

"Yes, Cal?" she asked as Cal came close to her. She didn't seem nervous or stressed so Sira wondered what was wrong, or if anything was wrong.

"I want you to come and meet my family," Cal said softly, barely audible. Confusion filled Sira's eyes for she thought that Cal didn't have any family. She had never mentioned them.  
"Sure," Sira stated politely and Cal led her over to the fullest table of them all. A thought flashed through Sira's mind because she knew that if Scabior was here and saw the table, he would laugh in Cal's face and say that there should have been eight chairs per table for seven people sat at the table. Everyone at the table's attention turned to Cal, waiting for her to say something.

"Everyone, this is my friend, Sira," she said proudly as they all studied her. Lark turned and looked at Cal and, to Sira's surprise; his eyes didn't harden with his hate towards her. It was if nothing could ruin this day for him. "Sira, this is Hayden, my cousin." She motioned to a handsome man with brown hair and blue eyes that set next to an empty chair that was probably Cal's.

"It's nice to meet you, Sira," he said politely, his voice a bit mysterious.

"It's nice to meet you too," she replied back as kindly as she could.

"And this is him wife, Alexis," Cal stated as she motioned to the woman with jet-black hair and brown eyes who sat at Hayden's left. "And that's Max," she said sweetly as the boy, who Sira finally realized was the ring bearer, flashed them a wide grin. "Anna is Lark's sister," she stated as she motioned to the flower girl and gave Sira a look telling her that she would explain later, "and this is his father." Lark's father gave her a stiff nod.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all," Sira muttered gently as she smiled at them.

"Do you have any family here today, Sira?" Alexis asked her tone soft and pleasant. Sira shook her head.

"No, but my fiancé is here with me," she replied lightly, comfortable with any small talk.

"How nice," Alexis stated. "Do you know when your wedding is?"

"No," Sira explained, "we don't have a date set yet. We're waiting for our lives to be less busy." Alexis nodded in approval and didn't seem to have anything else to say or ask.

"I better get back to my fiancé," she said quickly as she felt the tension rise in the air. "It was wonderful to meet you all again." She allowed a friendly smile to form on her face as she turned and headed back to Scabior at their table. From the look on his face, she could tell that he wasn't glad about her leaving and especially not happy about the Malfoy's sitting with them.

As she sank into her chair, Scabior's arm was automatically around her shoulders and she felt everyone's gaze on her. After giving them a little shrug, she looked at Scabior, who was looking at Lucius wrathfully. Lucius looked at both of them with disgust as Narcissa and Draco watched him. Tension was thick around their table. "Cal and Lark's family seemed nice," Sira said carefully, almost like she was treading on thin ice, "and I never knew that Lark had a sister."

"Who is she?" Narcissa asked, obviously uncomfortable with the silence.

"She was the flower girl," she stated slowly, trying to get Scabior's attention anywhere than Lucius. "Her name is Anna, but what I really didn't know either was that Cal has a cousin. His name is Hayden and his son, Max, was the ring bearer."

"Interesting," Narcissa said gently as Sira nudged Scabior with her elbow, finally getting his attention. Puzzlement, mixed with a bit of anger, shone in his eyes and she gave him a look that begged him to stop.

"Yes, very," Lucius drawled as he took his wife's hand and stood. Draco did the same and they all left, to Scabior's relief. Sira shook her head as she looked away from him.

"What's wrong, my lovely?" he questioned as he pulled her closer to him.

"I'm sorry but can you please just stop being all defensive and aggressive towards Lucius?" she asked softly, her voice almost pleading.

"'e never treated you right," Scabior growled, "and I don't want 'im trying to take you away from me." As she shook her head, she let out a sigh.

"Even if he does still long for me, Scabior, I won't allow him to take me. I love you and, even though I do have a past with him, I won't fall back into his arms. I've made that mistake once and I'll never do it again."

"But-."

"Just promise to me that you'll stop," she stressed, her eyes glittering with her fear. He let a sigh out of his chest and brushed his hand against her cheek.

"I promise," he whispered and she smiled at him. Happiness filled her and she rested her head on his chest, grateful for his cooperation. She loved him for that.

"If I could have your attention please," Seth called as everyone hushed and looked at him, "it is time for the first dance of the bride and groom so, Cal, Lark, the dance floor is all yours." Applause filled the air as the sweet sounds of the orchestra mixed with it, starting the dance. Lark led Cal out gracefully as a smile formed on both of their faces. All eyes were on them as one of her hands interlocked with one of his, placing her other on his shoulder as he placed his other on her waist, pulling her close to him.

Each step, each beat brought them close and closer together, her head rested on his shoulder as her ice-blue eyes closed. No one mattered to them, nothing mattered to them. They were two beating hearts slowly becoming one, two people just losing themselves in each other. Sira watched her friend dance with her new husband from the table where she sat with Scabior. There was a loving smile on her face. She leaned into Scabior as she gazed up into his eyes. They sparkled in the light, making them seem bluer than she had ever seen them before.

After a while, the music came to a soft stop and the applause started again. Cal and Lark finally came back to them, smiling soft but joyous smiles as they gazed at each other. Hayden and his wife stepped onto the dance floor, followed closely by their son, Max, and Lark's sister. Sira watched them carefully and fondly, until she felt a tap on her shoulder.  
Her eyes found Seth standing behind her, looking at her hopefully. "Sira," he said softly as his hand reached out to her, "may I have this dance?" She tilted her head a little as the smile wiped off of her face. As she looked at Scabior, the look that entered his eyes told her to go.

"Yes, Seth," she said kindly as she put her hand in his and stood from her chair and he led her like a true gentleman to the dance floor. His hand moved into the small of her back as he moved her into him a little and her hand went to his shoulder.

"So, you want me to guess who you are engaged with," he stated as he looked into her eyes with a warm seriousness.

"Yes, I want you to guess," she said with a light laugh and a playful smile. She thought it would be obvious, especially since she was sitting right next to her fiancé when he asked her to dance. Seth's eyes examined the room blankly, as if he was lost in thought. Soon, his eyes filled with confidence as they focused on a person.

"Is Lucius your fiancé?" he questioned and she had to fight back the laughter that so desperately wanted to escape from her chest. He gave her a puzzled look.

"No," she said quickly as some of the laugh broke out. "Why would you think that?"

"I did have to drag you off of him in Azkaban," he replied cockily as she rolled her eyes, wanting to forget her past affairs with Lucius. "So, is it the one Lestrange that isn't married to Bellatrix?" She shook her head quickly, this wasn't that hard. "Is it Selwyn?"

"Nope," she whispered as he continued to scan the room, "guess again." He exhaled his breath in a hiss, agitated with himself for not guessing right.

"Amycus?" he asked and she shook her head and he looked more agitated. "Dolohov?" Her head shook again and he sighed. "I give up," he hissed. "Who's your fiancé?"

"Scabior," she said with a smile that showed her passion for him. Confusion filled his eyes as he looked at her.

"What?" he asked in disbelief. "I was certain that you were going to wed another Death Eater. Why him?"

"Seth, Seth, Seth," she said softly as she shook her head again, "I'm in love with him, Death Eater or not. He has changed me, I'm not the girl you met in Azkaban, and hopefully, I'll never be that girl again. I can't live without him for he has helped me through so much. And just look at him, he's just so handsome and he's really caring and he's such a gentleman."

"So, are you still seeing multiple men?" he asked as a spark of desire burned in his eyes. Her jaw dropped a bit as her face showed her shock, she couldn't believe he just asked that. It was very rude and inconsiderate of him to ask, it made seem like a selfish jerk and, to top it off, she was just beginning to tolerate him and now she couldn't stand him.

"If I wasn't here at a wedding," Sira snarled as everything about her became wrathful, "I'd slap you for asking me that." The music stopped and she pushed away from him, heading as far away from him as she could as quick as she could. Fury and disbelief filled her, gleaming in her eyes as she gazed around the room.

"Sira," Hayden said as he walked up to her, "what's wrong? You look upset." She turned and looked at him, his blue eyes examining her.

"Oh, nothing," she sighed, "but thank you for asking." She gave him a tiny smile as her fury dissolved away. "I hope I'm not being rude and I don't mean to offend," she said after a long period of silence as she studied him, "but Cal never told me that she had family." She watched his face; he didn't look offended or surprised about what she said, which relaxed her.

"I would be surprised if she did," he stated as he sat down at the empty table that they were standing by. "I'll tell you her past, Sira, if you want to know." The prospect of knowing forced her to sit beside Hayden, she had wondered at times but she never dared to ask Cal in fear of upsetting her. Sira thought that she would tell her when she was ready.

"Cal's father," Hayden explained gently to her, "impregnated Cal's mother and then left her because he didn't want to have anything to do with her or their child. A few years Cal was born, her mother started bringing undeserving and abusive men to their home and she would forget that she even had a daughter when she had a man in the house. Her mother was also a heavy user of drugs and a heavy drinker and always seemed to be high or drunk. She would leave Cal alone and unsupervised and, when she did notice that she had a daughter, she would tell her that she was ugly and would never amount to anything and she'd never find anyone to love her. Then, one day, she left Cal alone and never came back; we never knew what happened to her.

"So Cal came to live with my family and I was like a brother to her," Hayden stated as his eyes gleamed with his remembrance. "She had changed so much, for the better, when she was living with us but her mother's words still bothered her. As she grew older, she became more eager to prove her mother wrong, to prove that she was beautiful and that she would amount to something, but most importantly, that she would find love." He smiled as he looked at Cal and Lark dancing. "Finally, she has proved her mother wrong." Sira looked down at her hands on the table, she couldn't believe Cal's past. It was so horrible; she thought that it was worse than hers.

"My uncle told me that I was scum and that no one would ever love me sometimes," she whispered as she looked at Hayden, "but I was never told that constantly and it was only because I'm a half-blood. I can't imagine what she had to go through." Hayden's eyes locked with hers, his were so warm and welcoming.

"But you've proved him wrong too, for you are engaged to be married," he stated politely as she smirked and laughed softly.

"Yeah," she said proudly, "and I appreciate that you told me this. Thank you." She turned her head to see Scabior walking towards her, his entire focus on her.

"You know," Hayden muttered, drawing her attention back to him, "you're not who I expected you to be, Sira Volkov." He smiled as he stood, noticing Scabior's approach. "You're a wonderful friend to Cal and you're going to be a wonderful wife to your fiancé." He left her there, walking away slowly. There was something about him that baffled her but she didn't know what it was. It was almost like he seemed old for someone so young. She wanted to talk to him more but she knew she shouldn't stop him or ask any more questions. He was interesting and yet so kind, she liked it.

Scabior's hand gently touched her shoulder, causing her to turn and smile at him. In his blue-grey eyes, love and compassion were sparkling. "Sira, who was that man?" he questioned, his voice not holding any suspicion.

"Cal's cousin, Hayden," she answered as she touched the hand that rested on her shoulder. He nodded his head approvingly, satisfied with her answer.

"May I 'ave this dance, beautiful?" he asked with a little smile. She nodded as her eyes filled with her answer. Gracefully, she stood as his hand wrapped around her wrist, pulling her lovingly to the dance floor, his eyes gazing into hers as she followed him, never wanting to stop following him. His hand drew her near to him, moving her into him with his lightest touch in the small of her back. Her hand, the one not in his, found his shoulder as her eyes grew soft. She looked up into his face, letting the soft sounds of the music to fill her, to sooth her.

He led her around the floor, swaying gently and each soft footstep perfectly on the beat. Her body mover closer and closer to his, her hand sliding to his chest as her head rested against it. The feeling his hand on her back drew her towards him, wanting the softness that was present in his touch. Slowly, her eyes began to close as she listened to his heartbeat.

Each move he made, each breath he took, brought her closer to him and farther away from the rest of the world. Nothing except him mattered to her right now. He was everything to her. His head rested against hers as her breaths became deep and slow. They felt as if nothing in the world could ever separate them, could never tear them away from each other. Nothing could touch them, nothing could stop them from loving each other and nothing could harm them. She rubbed her face in his shirt as she drifted farther away from the world.

Her mind wandered and a memory flashed into her mind, the memory of her crying in his arms. She had just murdered her best friend, Anastasia, and he had comforted her, just as he'd done hundreds of times before. She remembered the promises that he spoke to her and vowed to fulfill. She remembered his question and she remember her answer. She didn't regret anything from that time in his arms, for it all was so natural, so perfect. She didn't regret what she said to him.

"I love you, Scabior," she whispered to him as she opened her eyes gradually as the music started to slow. He dropped her hand and she wrapped her arms around his neck as he pulled her near into a hug, still swaying slightly to the music. "I don't know what I'd ever do without you."

"I don't know either, beautiful," he said softly, his head still resting against hers, his face in her hair. The last note faded away but they didn't stop. They continued their silent dance, lost in some other world as they held each other, never letting go.

The night outside their bedroom leaked into it, causing everything to become dark. Exhaustion drove Sira to the bed, making her climb in it as her eyelids grew heavy. It had been a long day but it was a happy one. She settled herself in between the cover as her head rested on the pillow. The door of the room opened and closed quietly, barely making a sound. She heard his footsteps coming towards the bed; he was trying not to disturb her.

He pulled back the covers and climbed into the bed, settling himself beside her as he pulled her near. "Scabior," she exhaled as he did so. She turned to face him, moving into his chest as she looked into his face. His eyes studied her with a bit of concern but they were mostly full of love. A longing welled up in her chest, the same longing she had felt earlier just that day. "I love you so much and I know that you are the man that I want to spend the rest of my life with." Her hands went to his face, rubbing his jaw caressingly. "I don't want to spend it with anyone else. Can we promise each other something, something that binds us together for the rest of our lives?"

"Yes, beautiful," he whispered as her hands moved to his bare chest, his eyes filling with his desire, "you can." With the lightest touch, he pulled her even closer to him as a smile, soft and devoted, formed on her lips.

"Until death do us part," she said, her voice rich with passion, confidence, and certainty. His hand moved up to her face, brushing her hair away as his eyes filled with his answer, consuming him, overpowering him.

"Until death do us part," he repeated and then his mouth moved onto hers, making her heart flutter with her joy. Her hands weaved into his hair as he pulled his body half-way on top of hers. She could feel his promise in his touch and in his kiss just as he could feel it in hers. The need to be bound to each other was satisfied with their words and now a new need flared within them. The need to make it official, to consummate it.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

The next two weeks were odd for Sira. Cal was gone with Lark on their two-week-long honeymoon, happily sharing their new marriage with each other. The Death Eaters were active but the Dark Lord was allowing her a break as a reward for causing the Ministry of Magic to fall. Scabior joined a Snatcher gang for he liked the prospect of gold, honor, and power but that meant he was gone most of the time, only coming back home to her a few nights a week. This all caused her to be stuck in her house, bored out of her mind.

Scabior hadn't been back in two days and she was starting to become anxious and restless, making her want to be with somebody or go somewhere or just do something. In her house, right now, she felt like she was trapped, caged. A longing welled up within her, a longing to go back to the place she hadn't been in what seemed like years. She felt that she needed to return there, she didn't exactly know why because there was nothing left for her there. She had to, though, she just had to. She would go back to Grimmauld Place.

Her eyes opened slowly, filling themselves with the sight of the door that she had opened so many times before. Her heart fluttered as sudden warmth filled her, causing her to draw a deep breath. She was so close to finally being home. A longing to touch the door consumed her as her hand reached for it. Memories filled her mind as her fingertips barely touched the wood; she placed her entire had on it.

Gradually, she drew her wand from her hip and tapped the door, causing the locks to click open as if they were waiting for her to return here, to return home. With a light push, she opened the door and took a careful step into the house. Her eyes examined her surrounding, someone had been here, but not in a while. Also, the house seemed quiet like no one was in it. The door shut behind her as she continued to examine the house.

Everything was about the same as it was when she was here last, silent, dusty, and covered in cobwebs. She took a step forward, barely off the doormat when a voice filled the hall. "Severus Snape?" the voice asked, it was Alastor Moody's. Then, an odd sensation washed over her, it was like her tongue folded over itself. The feeling didn't frighten her; it was only a Tongue-Tying Curse.

Carefully, she took another step forward and the curse undid itself. Relief filled her but it was quickly replace by a jolt of terror. A figure of a man rose out of the dust, horribly familiar and yet terrifying. He raised a dead hand up, pointing at her, as her heart hammered in her chest. The figure raced towards her, sending another jolt of fear through her. "I didn't kill you!" she cried as the figure approached. It bursted, sending dust into the air, and she steadied herself.

It was only a defensive, she told herself. It was not Dumbledore. She drew in a long breath as her heart stopped racing. Once she was calm enough, she took a step forward and nothing happened. She walked down the hall, the memories rushing back into her head as she moved through her time here. In the living room, she remembered when she first saw Sirius and fell instantly in love with him, when she told him she was not a killer, and when she fell when she fell asleep on it to see his face.

She remembered all the kisses, all the laughs, and all the tears. A mixture of sadness, warmth, and guilt filled her as she looked around the room, studying everything, as she relived her memories. Each touch, each smile, and each look wretched her heart. Her eyes filled with her tears as she thought back. It seemed like ages since she had been here, so much longer than only a year. A year, she thought, look at how far you've come in that short amount of time. Look at who you've become in that time.

Her heart twinged with her sorrow as her hand reached up and clutched her necklace at her throat, the necklace that Sirius had given her. She remembered the day perfectly, of how she didn't want to go to the Death Eaters, of how she didn't want to leave him, and of how she didn't want to say goodbye. She was never truly able to say goodbye to him, never truly able to accept the fact that he was gone.

Her mind flashed to his goodbye in the Department of Mysteries, causing her tears to streak down her face. Sira, oh my sweet Sira, his voice filled her mind, ringing in her ears. I wish to request you to do something. I want you to remember me, but not stop you from living your life. You have to continue on, Sira, even though I will not be with you in physical form. Life has to go on, it just has to.  
You have to let me go, his voice continued on, it will be difficult, Sira, but all I want is for you to be happy.

Sira, you have to, he stressed as her tears fell constantly from her eyes. Goodbye, Sira. Don't worry; you'll see me again someday. I love you. "I love you too, Sirius," she whispered and a loud sob broke from her chest, causing her to double over in her pain. She thought of his smile, the look in his eyes when he gazed at her, and his touch. How she missed him. How had she lived without him? She didn't know.

Slowly, she left the living room and headed to the staircase, the staircase that he had helped her up so many times it was impossible to count. Her heart felt heavy with her emotions as she climbed, her hand gripping the railing as if she was clinging to it for dear life. The cold of the wood felt odd under her fingers, making her feel worse. Her footsteps sounded too loud against the floor, her breaths seemed too uneasy, and the chill in the house seemed too cold. Was she really home? She was unsure if she was or not.

She treaded over to his bedroom door, wanting to open it as she approached it. As she stood at it, she rubbed her hand against it as she sighed and then pushed it open. Warm light filled the room as she studied it. Papers and books were scattered across the floor, the large bed was unmade, and a few cobwebs hung off the ceiling. Suddenly, she realized that the house had been searched, this room had been searched.

Without thinking, she started to pick up the papers and the books, putting them back in their rightful places. She didn't stop to study anything before everything was back to where it should be. Her memories didn't consume her as she worked, it was as if her mind wanted her to fix the room and restore it to how she had known it and loved it. Quickly, she finished with a sigh and then looked at the room.

Her eyes found the dresser to see that her white rose was still there, droplets of blood welling up on its snow-white petals as her mind went to the moment when she gave it to Sirius. They had been separated for a few weeks and she just had to see him, she didn't want anything more. She didn't want to lose him for she that she was about to. Then, she gave him a letter and a rose one night as he slept, not knowing that she was in the very same room as he was. The letter, she thought. It still sat beside the rose, untouched since Sirius read it last. She picked it up and read, her blue eyes rimmed with her tears as she did.

Dear Sirius,

I hope that you have been doing fine because I haven't. I cannot stop thinking about you and all I wish is for you to be happy. I realize that you deserve better than me, all I do is cause our relationship to be a long list of broken promises. I didn't mean to cause you pain, Sirius, and I deserve to suffer. I can barely breathe with the thought of hurting you. I never deserved your love.

Sirius, I'm sorry for ever hurting you. Just say the words and I'll be gone. I'll go away forever and you'll never have to see me again. I don't want us to end and I hope you feel the same. I love you, Sirius, and I'll always love you. You make my life worth living. You keep me from becoming insane. I need you, I want you, and it kills me to stay away. I know that you may not want me back but I hope that you aren't angry with me. I'm sorry and I can't forgive myself for what I did to you. I needed to contact you somehow and tell you how I feel. If you ever wish to see me, you always know where to find me.

Forever and always yours,  
Sira

P.S. If you ever want to know if I'm thinking of you, just watch the rose.

Sorrow overwhelmed her as she set the letter back down beside the bleeding rose and she turned away from it. She walked over to the bed, the bed that she and Sirius had shared so many memories in, and climbed into it, as she had always done before. Her hands pulled the covers up around her. His scent still lingered on the sheets, faintly there, and she hiccupped with her tears. She could still feel his arms around her, protecting her from the world, and she could still feel his mouth on hers, almost as if he had just kissed her.

Her body curled itself into a ball as she felt the sensation leave her. His arms were no longer around her, making the tears roll down her face even faster. Then, her mind flashed to what he would think of her now. Coming back here, reliving her past, made everything that she thought that she was doing right feel so wrong. Everything felt wrong, especially her lying in another bed with another man and being bound to him, not the man she truly wanted to be tied to.

"I've realized what I've done, Sirius," she whispered as she closed her blue eyes, her body starting to tremble with her grief. "I know what I've done is wrong." She drew in a deep breath, almost afraid to continue on. "I should've stayed with the Order but I'm in with the Death Eaters too deep, too deep to do anything. I've done so much wrong and I've tried to fix it but I can't… I can't…" A loud sob broke from her chest as she clutched the pillow as if she never wanted to let it leave her grasp.

"I still love you, Sirius," she sobbed as she opened her eyes, his face filling her mind. "I love you with all my heart but I've had to fill the hole you left me with another's love. I can't get over you, Sirius, but at least he takes an edge out of my pain, he makes me feel normal again but he can't heal me completely. He can't heal the scars you left me… the scars I left myself." She put her face in the old pillow for a second, her heart hammering in her chest, and then lifted her head again.

"I love you, Sirius, and I can't ever get you out of my life," she murmured as the lights slowly left her eyes. "I never want you out of my life." A sob racked her body, quaking her as she gasped. "Sirius, I miss you. I just want to see you again, to tell me that I'm not the person I think I am, that I'm still your Sira." A sudden wave of exhaustion engulfed her, causing her eyelids to grow heavy. She didn't fight the sleep; she just allowed it to take her away. There was no point in fighting it anymore. Gradually, she slipped away and into the darkness.

"Sira, wake up," a voice whispered lovingly into her ear as the arms, which were wrapped around her, pulled her close. She let out a long breath as the voice started to chuckle. "You need to get up, darling." She shook her head a little as her blue eyes opened slowly. The arms, the touch, and the voice were so familiar, something she had been waiting for.

"Sirius," she said happily as she gazed at the man she loved with all of her heart and a smile formed on her face. He chuckled again as she buried her face in his shirt, enjoying his warmth and his scent. His hand combed through her hair as he pulled her even closer to him.

"So what's this about not being my Sira?" he asked as he studied her. She looked up at him, puzzled and confused. He had really heard that? She asked herself. It was fairly obvious that he had.

"I just don't think that I'm the girl you fell in love with," she admitted as she gazed into his welcoming, grey eyes. "I'm not a good person anymore." He sighed and his face grew suddenly serious.

"Sira, listen to me," he stated. "You're still a good person, deep down. It's just that you've made some mistakes and bad things have happened to you that have changed you. All you need to do is what your heart tells you is right and not what your emotions tell you. Your heart is still pure. We all have light and dark, good and evil, inside of us, but you can choose which you act on. That's what makes a person, not what happens to them."

"But, Sirius," she exhaled, almost in a whine, "what if everything I'm doing now feels wrong? What if nothing feels right?"

"Even when you're with Scabior?" he asked, his question filling his eyes.

"Well, it didn't use to," she confessed, "but when I came back here, it now feels wrong to love another man. It's like I shouldn't and I should just separate from him."

"Do you really want that, Sira?" Sirius questioned softly and she dropped her eyes. "Could you leave him without feeling anything?" Could she? She thought of all Scabior had helped her through, all that he had comforted her about. She couldn't do it; she cared about him too much to leave him. Her eyes looked back up into Sirius'.

"No," she stated confidently, "I couldn't."  
"Then you really love him," he said gently, "and nothing's wrong with that." She gave him a tiny smile until a question popped into her mind suddenly.

"Then what of the Death Eaters? I know that what I do there is wrong but there is no way out," she stated flatly as her eyes filled with concern. He looked at her for a long while, not saying anything as his mind raced for an answer.

"There is one way out, Sira," he whispered to her, "and it's how my brother left the Death Eaters. As you said once before, that Mark on your arm is a death sentence. It's one thing that I wished you never had to do." He paused as if searching for the right words, and then continued on. "But, there's something you can do that will make Voldemort less dependent on you. You'll need help from other Death Eaters that want to leave too. They have seen the error of Voldemort's way and aren't willing to serve him as much. Find these people and try to get them to do the same as you. You need to stay loyal to him and you need to follow him but you need to figure out a way that you can still be close yet distant at the same time."

"I just have to go slowly," she said, "so he doesn't notice." He smiled a gentle smile at her.

"Precisely," he muttered as he leaned in close to her, "and, Sira," he brushed some of her hair out of her face, "I love you and all I want is for you to have the life that we should've had together." His mouth met hers as his hands cupped her face. His kiss was like everything she remembered it to be and yet so much more. She didn't know how she was able to live without him and yet she knew she could, and she was. She could continue her life and it was all thanks to him and Scabior.

Her blue eyes opened slowly as her lips tingled with the kiss. She was alone, back in his dirty, old bedroom but instead of feeling disappointed, she felt confident and determined. She wanted to make Sirius proud and she wanted to prove to herself that she was still Sirius' Sira. Sirius' words weren't enough for her; she needed to see it for herself. She was going to change her ways.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The bedroom was completely black when Scabior walked into it. He had just gotten back from a mission with the Snatchers and he was eager to see his fiancé for the first time in three days. He didn't like leaving her here or leaving her alone but she understood why he was doing what he was doing and that's all he needed. She supported him and he loved her even more for that. His footsteps were soft on the hardwood floor; he didn't want to wake her up from her slumber. As he walked over to the bed, he pulled his jacket off of his shoulders. He reached the bed and climbed into it, too tired to think about anything other than her.

She lay on her back, her chest rising and falling in steady breaths, and her face was so peaceful. Her dreams weren't bothering her tonight, like they occasionally did. He moved in next to her, studying her face as he gently pulled her into his chest. Desire flared in his eyes as he touched her soft skin. She shifted into his touch, into his body with a little sigh. He couldn't help himself; he pulled himself onto her body and cupped her face in his hands as his lips lightly kissed hers. Her blue eyes opened slowly as a smile formed on her face and a little laugh escaped her chest. "'ello, beautiful," he whispered as he gazed into the set of eyes he always loved to look into.

"Well, hello," she said sleepily as she put her arms around his neck. "What time is it?"

"Just 'bout midnight," he stated as she closed her eyes again.

"I'm glad you're home," she muttered, opening her eyes again as she flashed him a sleepy smile. "I've missed you." Her mouth met his in a kiss, this time more passionate and alert than before. He didn't fight her kiss, right now all he wanted was her. His breath was hot in her mouth as she suddenly became completely awake and aware of her desire to have him tonight. His mouth slowly moved to her neck as her fingers started to unbutton his shirt.

The morning light in the room was growing old when Sira finally woke to find herself still in Scabior's arms. He was still fast asleep. She really had missed him, even if it only had been three days. It had been three days without her love. She moved closer to him, resting her hand on his bare chest as she placed her head on his shoulder.

Her mind wandered to what Sirius had said to her, about how she needed to find the ones in the Death Eaters that wanted out. He said that they would help her but who were they? Who were the ones that wanted out more than anyone else? She thought through all of the Death Eaters and the only ones she could think of were the Malfoy's. Their family used to be on the top, one of the Dark Lord's favorites. She would need to talk to them and get them with her but she felt like she would have to promise to do something for them before they did anything for her. Fear shot through her, she didn't want to have to do that again.

Scabior shifted as he woke; yawning a little before he pulled her even closer into his chest. His hand stroked her hair as she looked up at him, her eyes glittering in the light. "Good morning," she said gently as she smiled at him.

"Good morning," he replied as he stretched. "I'm sorry, beautiful," he whispered with a sigh, "but you know that I 'ave to leave again soon."

"It's okay," she said flatly. "I understand." He moved in close, his lips brushing again hers, and he kissed her lips passionately, not wanting to go.

"I love you, Sira," he stated compassionately as his hand touched her face.

"I love you too," she whispered back and he climbed out of the bed, releasing her from his arms as he moved away. As he started to dress, she just laid there, her thought returning to her. Maybe she could talk to the Malfoy's today but she knew she would have to invite them here, to her house, to get her feelings across. Her hands rubbed her eyes, trying to get her thoughts to un-muddle. Soon, she, too, climbed out of the bed and dressed quickly. By the time she was done, Scabior had already kissed her goodbye and left. Something in her stomach turned as she thought about him. She didn't know why but she put it aside, as if it was nothing.

A knock on the door brought her to her feet from sitting on the sofa. Quickly, she went to the door and opened it and a smile stretched across her lips. On her doorstep, stood Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy. Both of their eyes were filled with fear, suspicion, and concern and she noticed that they wouldn't look her directly in the eye.

"Hello, Lucius," she said happily, actually glad that they came. "Hello, Narcissa. Please come in." They stepped into the house and she closed the door before turning to them. "Let's talk in the living room, shall we?" she asked as she sauntered past them. They followed her into the living room where they all took their seats. Lucius was glaring at Sira and Narcissa was looking nervously from Sira to her husband. "So, you're wondering why I have asked you here," she said loudly as she watched both of them.

"Yes, why are we here, Sira?" Lucius asked defensively, sounding vicious, as his eyes burned with his irritation. The smile wiped off of her face as she looked at him, her eyes turning serious.

"We want the same thing, Lucius," she stated. "I've seen the error of my ways and I want to change. I no longer want to be a Death Eater." All was silent, they just glared at her.

"How do we know you aren't lying?" Narcissa asked her voice icier than what Sira had ever heard it before. An appalled look covered Sira's face like a mask.

"You don't trust me?" she questioned, her tone almost a whine, as she looked at him.

"Why would we trust you? Lucius asked in a snarl, his eyes turning murderous. "You're so close to him now, you have his respect, and you have his trust. Why would you want out? You're his lap-dog, his bitch. You're most likely trying to get us to say what you want so you can go tell him." Anger flared in her chest, burned in her eyes, as her jaw tightened. She wanted to lash out at Lucius but she willed herself back, fearing what would happen if she didn't.

"I will make an Unbreakable Vow, right now, Lucius," she growled, "saying that I am true to my word, that I'm not lying to you." She stood, offering him her hand. "If it is the only way that you will believe me, I'm willing to do it." He looked to Narcissa, unsure about making a vow.

"Why do you want to leave, Sira?" Narcissa asked, making Sira's attention shift from Lucius. "I mean, you're one of favorites now, it just seems unimaginable that you would want to leave." Sira looked into Narcissa's eyes, they serious but they weren't angry.

"I joined the Death Eaters on orders from the Order of the Phoenix," she stated, trying to hide the snarl in her voice. "I didn't wish to join the Death Eaters but I had to get information for the Order. I didn't choose any of this, Narcissa, and I don't like who I've become. I've seen the errors of the ways of the Death Eaters, and of the Dark Lord, and I see that it's all wrong. I don't want to be a part of something that I don't believe in and something that you can rise to the top in and then be thrown to the side in the same amount of time. It's all wrong and I see that now, just like I did before." They both studied her, looking for any signs of her lying. Then, Lucius stood and she offered him her hand again. He took it, his grip tight on her.

"Bind us," Lucius growled to Narcissa, his eyes boring into Sira's with intensity, "with the Unbreakable Vow." Narcissa stood and went to them, drawing her wand as she did so. "Will you, Sira Volkov," he drawled, his eyes never breaking away from her blue ones, "stay true to your word, saying that you wish to leave the service of the Death Eaters?"

"I will," she promised flatly, her eyes dead serious.  
A tongue of flame shot out of Narcissa's wand, wrapping itself around her and Lucius' hands as if it was a red-hot wire.

"And will you speak only the truth to us, Lucius, Narcissa, and Draco Malfoy?" he asked, his tone flat and steady.

"I will," she stated and another flame wrapped around their hands.

"And will you speak none of this to the Dark Lord, knowing that if you do, it means your life?" he questioned, his voice hissing the word life. Her chin dropped a little as her lips pursed, watching his face for any signs of resentment. There was none.

"I will," she exhaled softly and the wire shot out of the wand, binding them one, final time. The wires glowed as they continued to study each other's faces. Narcissa withdrew her wand, putting it back as the wires slowly dimmed, fizzling out as if they had been doused in cold water. He finally removed his hand from hers when the wires were completely gone. There was something about his eyes that made her think, that made her wonder. It was as if they were emptier than usual, lifeless.

"Sira," Narcissa said flatly as they all too their seats, "we do want out of the Death Eaters, but we are so low now, the Dark Lord expects that we will try to leave. There's no way out for us. We are constantly being watched and he's always causing us to suffer more and more each day." Sira's mind raced with her words, trying to think of a solution.

"There is a way, Narcissa," she stated, "a few ways actually and two of them, you know of." Both Lucius and Narcissa looked at her curiously, wanting to know. "Firstly, there is death, we all know that one. Secondly, there's gaining back the Dark Lord's trust, this is the one that you're trying right now. Thirdly, there is switching alliances at the perfect moment. This one is risky and has to be done at the right time or it will backfire on you and you will meet your death. I suggest that you do two or three, unless you aren't afraid of death, then choose one."

"What will you do?" Lucius asked, examining her to see if she became unsure.

"I'm already doing it," she said almost in a whisper. "First, I needed to get you with me, and then I will slowly back out while staying loyal to him. He will not use me as much soon, I just know it, and once I see the opportunity to leave, I will."

"So you don't have a plan for sure," Narcissa muttered and Sira shook her head.

"I'll just make it up as I go along," she replied, "like I always do." Lucius scoffed a little and she glared at him, but it was true, his reaction was true and she wasn't going to tell him otherwise. They sat in silence for a long time, only exchanging glances. They all felt like their business was done here, like there was no more to say.

"Narcissa, we better be going," he stated as he stood. His wife gave him a small nod, stood, and followed him out of the room. She heard the door open and close and she knew she was all alone again. Her mind started to race. Why wasn't she feeling anxious or nervous? Why wasn't she afraid? She had just mad an Unbreakable Vow with the Malfoy's, she should be feeling something. Maybe it was because she had already made so many promises. Maybe it was because she was bound to so many people. It was just a normal thing for her now, making promises, and everyone knew that she would keep them as best as she could. She allowed a sigh to escape her chest as she sank back in her chair, closing her eyes.

The door to the drawing room opened and Lucius Malfoy stepped inside, his grey eyes bright with his anticipation. He had something to tell his Lord, something that may bring honor back to his family's none. "Lucius," a cold voice hissed, coming from a tall figure that stood by the fireplace, "if you are here to grovel at my feet and beg for forgiveness, then go. I have no time for that."

"My Lord," Lucius said quickly, unable to hide his eagerness, "I do not wish to do that for I have new for you, news about one of your Death Eaters." The Dark Lord's attention turned to him, his red eyes staring at him.

"Really?" he asked in a cold him. "Who is it?" He could not hide his curiosity, it filled his eyes.

"Yes, my Lord," Lucius whispered quickly. "It is Sira Volkov. She has told me personally that she wishes to leave the service of the Death Eaters. She no longer desires to be a part of the Cause. She wants nothing that the Death Eaters have to offer her." His eyes glittered with his words, with his willingness to please his Lord. "And she is already planning to leave. What do you want me to do about this, my Lord?" The Dark Lord knew that Lucius only spoke the truth, the truth that one of his favorites was betraying him. Anger swirled within him, causing his eyes to become murderous.

"No, I will take care of Volkov myself, Lucius," he said icily, looking into the fire as he thought of a way to break her, to subdue her, but not kill her. He was silent for the longest time, his mind running through all the possibilities. He finally came to one and an evil smile grew on his cruel face. "You will be rewarded, but Volkov will be paying dearly for her crimes against me." His eyes studied the flames, knowing that his plan would truly tear her apart. "You are dismissed."

Lucius bowered to him, a smirk on his face as he did so, and then turned and left the room, suddenly becoming nervous. The Dark Lord continued to gaze at the tongues of flame. "Volkov," he said, barely a whisper, "I expected more from you and you will be begging for death when I am finished with you."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Sira opened the door to her house after hearing a series of loud knocks on it. A smile formed on her face as she saw who it was, she was truly glad to see them again for they had been god for a while now and she hadn't heard from them during that time either. "Cal! Lark!" Sira said, a bit too joyous. "It's good to see you! Come in." She welcomed them into her home, Cal had a smile on her face as she looked from Lark to her, and she acted like she had something she wanted to say. Lark's arm wrapped around her shoulder as Sira led them into the living room.

"So how was the honeymoon?" she asked as they all sat down, her in a chair and Cal and Lark on the sofa. Cal looked at Lark with mischief entering her ice-blue eyes and then looked back at Sira.

"It was wonderful, perfect," Cal stated compassionately. "It couldn't have been more perfect." Sira's smile grew a bit wider as she studied them, wondering when it would be the right time to tell them her news. She could barely believe that she managed to do it, but she had no regrets and she knew that they would be glad she did. "We have some news for you, Sira," Cal said smoothly as Lark's attention shifted from Cal to Sira, his emerald eyes glittering with warmth as he looked at her.

"And I have news for you," she stated proudly. Cal's eyes turned puzzled as her head cocked to the side a little.

"Really?" Cal asked, her curiosity filling her voice just as Lark's filled his eyes.

"Yes, but you first," Sira said with a light laugh. "I can wait."

Everything was silent as Cal's smile grew on her face, her eyes gleaming with her excitement for her friend to know. She was going to make her guess. Lark pulled Cal a little nearer, a small smile forming on his face as he did so. Sira gazed at them, waiting for an answer that she knew would never come as her eyes became a bit duller, clouded with her thoughts. She racked her mind, thinking of what Cal's new was. Suddenly, she came to it. She didn't believe it, she couldn't believe it.

"Cal," she said rapidly as she jumped to her feet, her eyes wide with her disbelief, "you're pregnant?" Cal's smile grew wider as she watched her friend, who was in total and utter shock.

"Yeah," she replied as Lark let out a chuckle at Sira's surprise, her extremely-frazzled surprise.

"Don't act so surprised, Sira," Lark said to her cockily. Sira drew in a long breath as she closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as she looked at Cal, who was smiling with her amusement. "I just never thought that you would be pregnant, Cal. That's why I'm so shocked." Cal laughed as she shook her head a little.

"It's okay, Sira," she said, her voice sounding certain and sure of herself. "It would be the same for me if you told me you were pregnant." Then, the certainty left her eyes and she leaned forward in her seat. "Are you pregnant, Sira? Is that your news?" Sira didn't know if she should be stunned or if she should be bursting out with laughter. Her eyes grew wide and her body stiffened.

"No," she stated as she shook her head. She walked over to a small table in the corner of the room and picked up a Daily Prophet and then walked back to them. She handed Cal the paper and then sat back down in her chair. "Read the headline," she whispered as a smile reformed on her face. Lark leaned close to Cal, their eyes curious and puzzled.

"A New Development in the Case of Sira Volkov, Guard to be Hired Back," Cal breathed, gazing at the words as if she didn't know what to believe. Lark's eyes shot up to Sira, burning with a mixture of confusion and disbelief.

"What did you do?" he asked in total shock.

"I got you your job back," she said proudly as she gave him a kind smile. "It wasn't easy but I got it back for you and it helped that I'm a Death Eater and that the Ministry is being controlled by us now. All I had to do was tell some officials that my escape was not your fault and that it was an error of security in the hospital. I told them that you were in no way responsible for it and, after a while, they believed me and agreed to offer you back your job. Thank goodness I was cleared of all charges for the time being so I could do this for you." His eyes were still in disbelief but she saw a flicker of gratitude in them.

"You really did this?" Cal asked, finally looking up from the paper. Her eyes were rimmed with tears. "You really did this for us?"

"Yes," she whispered with a little nod of her head. "I really did." Cal stood quickly and rushed over to Sira, who stood as she approached. She threw arms around her friend as the tears streaked down her face. She was so grateful for Sira helping them; she didn't think she could ever thank her for this.

"Thank you," Cal panted and Lark stood from his seat as she hugged Sira's neck tighter. "Thank you for giving us this." Lark's hand touched her shoulder and she backed away from Sira. His eyes were no longer in disbelief and they were filled with warmth as he studied Sira.

"You're not as bad as I always thought you were," he said softly. "You were able to put aside our differences to do something which you would see no benefit from, to do something selfless. You didn't have to do that, Sira, but you did anyway, even though we dislike each other. Thank you and I'm thankful that you would do such a thing for me. Now, I wonder if I was wrong about you, wrong about how I treated you."

"Lark," she whispered as she gazed into his eyes, "what I did to you was horrible and it was wrong of me to do that to you. You have every right to be angry; I'm still ashamed of it myself."

"But I let my anger fog my vision of you, Sira," he stressed. "I let it consume me and it made me unable to see your shame and your regret. All I knew was that I hated you for you were evil, twisted, and cruel but, truly, you're not. I shouldn't have said the things I've said to you, I was the one who was wrong and I'm sorry for that." He sighed as he shook his head a little. "I forgive you now, Sira, and can you please forgive me so that we could, maybe, be friends?"

"I would like that, Lark," she said with a smile. "I would like that very much. I forgive you." He smiled at her, a kind and warm smile. He hesitated and then moved close to her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a hug. Her body stiffened at his touch, fearing as if it would burn her, but then relaxed into it and closed her eyes. Soon, he moved away from her and she gave him a small smile.

"Thank you again, Sira," he said politely as he wrapped his arm around his wife. She nodded as he gazed into Cal's ice-blue eyes lovingly. "We don't want to keep you," he said gently as his attention returned to her.

"We don't want to over stay our welcome," Cal said kindly as she looked at Sira. "We'll just be going now."

"Cal," Sira breathed, "you're always welcome here but you may leave if you like." She led them to the door and they stepped out. After they told each other their goodbyes, she closed the door and leaned against it, thinking about what had just happened.

The dying light of the sun filled the room as her blue eyes watched the world outside her window change colors. She was all alone, waiting for Scabior to return to her again. Her stomach shifted nervously, something was about to happen, something big. Her heart beat a little quicker and her palms were a little sweaty. She knew something was going to happen and she had the feeling that she should be fleeing for her life. The feeling overwhelmed her, causing her to become antsy.

A burning shot through her left arm, searing her skin, and causing her to jump. Her eyes grew wide as she let out a hiss. Her hand clutched her wrist, her body trembling a little bit with the pain. The burning of her Mark was worse than she had even felt before. She knew that he was angry.

She rushed out of the room without thinking to grab her traveling cloak. Once in the hall, she vanished from the spot with a soft pop.

When she arrived on the doorstep of the Malfoy Manor, the door was slightly ajar and it seemed like nobody was home. She moved through the house, somehow knowing that they would be in the drawing room as she studied the darkness. The air didn't feel right, it caught in her throat.

She reached the door of the drawing room and she pushed the door open slowly. The air in the room was icy the second it touched her skin and it held so much tension she could take it in. As the door closed behind her, everyone's attention shifted to her, even though some of them didn't look at her. Their shares were ominous, oppressive. They stood along the long walls of the room, standing at attention and ready to respond to a command.

"Volkov," a chilling voice hissed, "Come to me." She did as she was told, walking in the middle of the two rows of Death Eaters, walking straight towards the Dark Lord. Her footsteps filled the room as she passed her comrades. Just from their gazes, she knew that something was going to happen to her. Her eyes looked into Voldemort's face, never looking away as she approached. He signaled her to halt when she was directly in the middle of the room and she obeyed.

"I am disgusted with you, Volkov," he said in a cruel hiss as his eyes burned with his rage, "disgusted that you have lost your loyalty to me. You no longer wish to be a Death Eater; you no longer wish to serve me. Are you going back to your precious Order of the Phoenix?" A snicker of laughter filled the air. "Do you want to be back on the 'good' side?" The laughter grew louder as her eyes found Lucius. He looked straight ahead, as if he didn't notice her and her eyes burned with her fury. She knew he did this to her. "Most of them have gone into hiding, refusing to fight anymore. Is that the side you desire to be on? Hmm, Volkov? Because the truth is, you never can.

"You have sworn your loyalty to me when you received that Mark on your left forearm," he snarled, "and now you wish to no longer associate yourself with us, you want nothing to do with us. Being a Death Eater is nothing you can rethink. As you said once before to the Order, it is a death sentence. You will serve me until your death and that is final. There is no leaving, there is no quitting. Once you have given yourself over to me, you are mine forever.

"Only, you believed that you could escape my grasp and leave my service but you were caught before you could slip through my fingers. You will be punished, as will any of you," he stated as he motioned to his other Death Eaters, "for your disloyalty." Narcissa, who stood beside her husband, shot her a nervous look and Sira looked at Cal, who was standing to her left. She looked dead ahead, like Lucius was, and trying not to notice her friend.

"I created you, Sira Volkov," Voldemort said firmly, his tone murderous, "and I can destroy you. I have made you who I wanted you to be and I can break you. I will break you. Tonight, you will be setting an example, an example of what will happen to a Death Eater who steps out of their boundaries, who steps out of line, and, after I am through with you, you will be stripped of your rank and forced to continue on with the lowest and least-honored of my followers, the Snatchers. That is, if you are still whole enough to continue living." A cackle of laughter filled the air as her eyes grew wider, filling with her fear. "You will still be a Death Eater, Volkov, but you will be the lowest of the low, barely a Death Eater anymore." He drew his wand slowly, aiming it at her. "This is what you receive for thinking you can escape me; alone with all of your fellow's mockery of you. I have warned you that this would happen, but sometimes, punishment makes the point very clear. Crucio."

Pain bursted through her body, sending her crumbling to the floor. Her scream caught in her throat, choking her as her muscles spasm. All she could do was lay there on the floor and cry out in her pain. She felt like she was being ripped apart and broken. Sweat beaded up on her forehead as she tried to pick herself off of the floor, only to collapse back to it. Her jaw clenched, her teeth gritting, as she muffled a scream that so desperately wanted to escape her chest. The agony stopped suddenly and she rolled over onto her back, her breaths coming in labored pants, her eyes closed, and her jaw still locked.

She could feel the stares of the Death Eaters on her but she tried not to focus on them, she was desperately trying to close her mind, something she hadn't done in ages. She didn't want Voldemort entering her mind for she knew he would bring forth horrible images that she couldn't dare to witness. The sound of his footsteps came closer to her, she let out a whimper as her body continued to quake. A hiss filled her ears and her body went cold. His hand wrapped around her throat, his grip icy, as he pulled her up to her knees. She refused to open her eyes. Her jaw unclenched and she gasped for breath, panting hard as she threw her head back. "Look at me, Volkov!" he barked as her eyes opened for just an instant.

Fear shot through her heart, making it hammer in her chest. Her mind was open, just like her eyes were, and she could feel him boring into her, his crimson eyes burning with such intensity that she longed to look away but she couldn't. Suddenly, her body went stiff in his grip and then he let her go, allowing her to drop to the floor. She was completely limp, knowing that he was in her mind now, until another tremor went through her, chilling her.  
Her mind raced as a wave of pain rolled over her. Her mother's face as she said her goodbye, her uncle Faulkner's hand striking her, Faulkner's cruel words, the eyes of all the people she took out of this world, and her being drug into Azkaban flashed before her eyes, causing her to gasp. More memories joined them, each worse than the last. She wheezed and her shrill scream filled the room, sending a chill through everyone in the room. Some jumped as they continued to watch her, fearful that they would be next to feel her pain. Then, a memory filled her mind and she fell silent.

Sirius was dueling Bellatrix on the stone dais in the Department of Mysteries and he was laughing at her. "Come on you can do better than that!" he bellowed, his proud voice echoing. A jet of light hit him squarely in the chest as his eyes filled with horror but his face was still full of laughter.

Her eyes grew wide and she ripped her hand out of Lucius' grip, watching him with terror.

His body took ages to fall through the tattered veil that hung in that ancient archway.

Her breath caught in her chest as time seemed to stand still.

There was fear in his eyes; she could see it even at the distance she was from him. He fell through, disappearing behind the veil as if fluttered and fell back limply into place. Her body went numb as she heard Bellatrix's scream. She couldn't breathe. "Sirius… no." Her eyes never felt the veil as she spoke the words.

The tears welled up in her eyes as she went into a state of disbelief. "SIRIUS!" she screamed, unknowing that the Death Eaters were hearing it too as the tears poured from her eyes. "SIRIUS!" Her voice was as desperate as it was the day it happened. "SIRIUS!" She couldn't stop screaming his name, even after the memory faded away.

Her hands dug into the floor, trying to grip it as she opened her eyes to see the ceiling of the room in the Malfoy Manor. Her face was wet with her tears as her breath rattled in her chest. Her blue eyes foggy with her pain and her body trembling as she let out a strangled cry out of her throat. Her mind filled with an image again but her eyes were still open.

She felt a pair of arms around her. They were familiar, comforting and assuring. Her eyes opened slowly to see his face, his grey eyes looking back into hers. She was home, finally home. Her body cuddled up to his, acting so innocent as if she had done no wrong in her life. "Sirius," she whispered as a small smile formed on her lips. She was back in Number 12 Grimmauld Place, back in his bed and back in his arms. "Oh how I love you, Sirius." Something flickered in his eyes as he stayed silent. It was something he had never seen in his eyes, repulsion, disgust, and irritation. "What's wrong?" she asked, her happiness turning into concern, as her stomach gave a sickening twist. There was something wrong, something horribly wrong.

He pushed her away from him; he had never done so before, and he shook his head. She sickened him and horror filled her eyes. This can't be happening, she told herself as she gazed at him, frightened for she didn't know what was going on. "Sirius, please talk to me," she panted and he glared at her. His eyes burned with hate and rage, hers grew wide.  
"Why would I ever talk to you?" he asked his voice livid and cold. "Why would anyone ever talk to you? You're worthless, heartless, and you barely care about anyone else other than yourself." He ripped the cover off of him and jumped out of the bed, his body brimming with fury. Tear rimmed her eyes, this couldn't be happening.

"Sirius," she pleaded, her blue eyes terrified as she looked at him. He wasn't looking at her; he refused to look at her. She sat up in the bed, her face growing more desperate. "Sirius." he turned to face her, his eyes freezing cold.

"Don't you 'Sirius' me, Sira Volkov," he snapped at her, causing her jaw to drop. Total disbelief filled her, Sirius would never act like this but he was acting like this right now. "We both know that you amount to nothing and that you don't deserve to live. We both know that you don't feel for the people you harm, the people you cause to suffer. You're just scum and it's all you'll ever be." Her tears streaked down her cheeks as her body started to tremble.

"That's not true," she exhaled, her eyes fixed on his angry face, never leaving it. A snarl of disgust broke from his chest as his eyes bored into hers. "Don't you believe me?"

"Why would I ever believe a loose woman like you?" he questioned in a bark, shouting the words at her. His mouth was twisted into a snarl and his body was stiff, as if ready to attack. "You're always flaunting yourself around men, showing off your feminine wares as if you're up for sale to the highest bidder. You're sick; you make me physically ill when I lay next to you because I know that you have lain with more men than just me." She opened her mouth to say something, the tear rolling down her face, but he silenced her. "Don't tell me that you haven't, Sira! I know you have!"

"But, Sirius," she muttered and a sob rattled her body, choking her, "don't you love me?"

He started to laugh at her, a vicious, cruel laugh and her eyes widened even more with her fear. Her hands clutched the sheets of his bed, clinging for dear life, as her body went stiff, never moving from the spot other than the trembling that quaked her. "I hate you, Sira Volkov," he snarled, his words were like a knife stabbing her heart. "I hate everything about you, but especially who you are, who you've become." She winced at his words, they were agonizing. "You don't know how good your life is, you just think that it is so awful and horrible and you make everyone feel the same pain that you force yourself into. I hate you, for that and for everything."

She dropped her eyes from his face, her sobs becoming louder and more painful for her. "Sirius," she begged, wanting the man she knew and loved back and not this monster.  
"Don't talk to me!" he barked at her, bringing a new wave of tears to her eyes. "Don't ever talk to me!" He stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him as she collapsed onto the bed, her body curling up as if to protect herself. She convulsed whenever she tried to take a breath, Sirius' words were ringing in her ears, in her mind. She felt weak, empty. She didn't want to allow herself to believe it but his words were mostly true and she had a feeling that all of them were. Her eyes closed, unable to stop the tears or his words in her head, as she continued to tremble.

"Sirius, I love you," she whispered, all the eyes of the Death Eaters upon her, as she quaked on the floor, "no matter what you say." A loud sob racked her, causing her to gasp as they continued to stare at her. Cal watched her friend with horror in her ice-blue eyes but she didn't do anything for her, she couldn't do anything for her. She knew if she did, she would be tortured as well and she had another life to think about. Just a few people away, Narcissa looked at her husband nervously as Sira started to whimper. There was a question in her eyes as she looked at him and, when he looked at her, he shook his head. He knew, too, that there was nothing that could help her now. Within the Death Eaters, any idea of leaving had just been slaughtered; they didn't want to have to experience Sira's fate.

The Dark Lord stepped closer to her slowly, his footsteps barely making a sound. Her breathes were ragged, almost wheezes as the tears continued to pour from her eyes. Her arms clutched her knees to her chest, squeezing them harder and harder as she tried to feel something other than pain and nothing. His crimson eyes fixed on her as she continued to sob. "Kill me," she panted as her blue eyes opened slowly, looking dully at her fellow Death Eaters. They didn't respond, they just continued to look at her with shock on their faces. "JUST KILL ME!" she barked, no longer wanting to continue on, no longer wanting to live. His icy laughter filled her ears, chilling her to the bone.

"Maybe you'll think twice about disobeying me, Volkov," the Dark Lord as she shrieked with her grief and her agony. He turned away from her, focusing on one of his Death Eaters. He had broken her, shattered her. "Lucius take her away, get her out of my sight," he ordered flatly.

"Yes, my Lord," Lucius said quickly as he gave him a bow. He walked past his Lord and kneeled next to Sira, his hand resting on her shoulder. He took her arm, dragging her quivering body to her feet, and she let out another whimper. She tried to stand, but she couldn't. She fell to the floor just to be caught by Lucius, who held her close and almost carried her out of the room. She couldn't think, her mind was filled with Sirius' angry words. Her hands clutched Lucius' shirt, just as she had clutched the sheets of Sirius' bed, as he led her out into the hall, away from everything that just happened behind that now-closed door. She hung onto him, her tears streaming down her face. She would never let go of him.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Sira's hands clung to Lucius' shirt as he opened the front door of her house. She was weak in his arms, weak from all she had just endured, and the tears still rolled down her cheeks. Her mind was racing from one thing to another, dazing her, making her unaware and unable to sort out what had just happened. All she knew for sure was that she was at her house, that Lucius was holding her, and that she was just tortured by Voldemort for punishment for her wishing to leave the Death Eaters. Other than that, she wasn't certain.

She didn't know if what Sirius had said to her was true, she didn't know if what he had done to her was reality. It was unbelievable, he would never say anything like that to her and yet, it felt so real. Confusion filled her eyes as Lucius led her up the staircase. Sirius would never say anything like that to her, he would never be that angry at her, and he would never act that way. He would never do any of that, but why did it hurt so bad? Was it because most of his words held truth? She had a feeling that this' why his words cut her like a knife.

As Lucius opened the door to her parents' old bedroom, her mind suddenly became clear. Her eyes filled with her coming realization. Someone had told the Dark Lord that she wanted to leave; only two people know that she wanted it, and one of them would never tell. Anger flared in her chest, glowing in her eyes. Lucius was the one who tattled, Lucius had caused her to be punished. He was completely responsible for everything that had happened to her.

With a snarl, she tore her body away from his, her rage causing her body to become rigid. He gave her a startled look, his eyes astonished as she glared at him. "You did this to me," she snarled and he flinched, shocked with her sudden change in behavior. She rushed towards him and slapped his face as hard as she could. "You caused me to lose the Dark Lord's favor!" she barked as her hands grasped his throat, clenching hard, wanting to feel the life leave his body as he suffocated. Her eyes burned with her wrath as her hands wrapped around his neck tighter.

The next thing she knew, she was on the floor, her hands no longer around his throat and he was gazing at her, wand drawn and at the ready. "Sira, listen to me," he drawled, trying to calm her down. A snarl escaped her chest as she stared at him fiercely. Her hand slowly reached for the knife at her hip, watching Lucius' face carefully, never breaking away from his gaze.

She lunged at him, jumping to her feet and throwing herself at him. The knife slashed through the air, causing him to duck but he was too slow. The blade ran across his check, opening the skin and making blood well up on the site. Anger filled his eyes and he lunged at her, his hands reaching for the blade. "Give me the knife!" he ordered, failing at his first attempt.

"No!" she barked, trying to avoid him and yet still strike him. She rushed towards him again, but he was expecting it this time. His hand grasped her wrist, twisting her arm as he glared into her eyes menacingly. Rapidly, he flipped around, moving under her arm, and forced it behind her back, causing her to gasp. He wrenched her arm and shoved her against the wall, his body pinning her there. She struggled, trying to break free, but she couldn't and he already had the knife out of her hand, casting it aside quickly.

"Sira," he whispered into her ear as he leaned harder against her as she continued to fight his grip, "you have to listen to me. You need to know something." She stopped her struggling as her eyes grew wide. Was he actually going to apologize? "Will you let me tell you?"

"Yes, Lucius," she said softly and he turned her around. His eyes were no longer angry and he moved away from her a bit, his hand gripping her shoulders tightly as they pinned her against the wall. Her rage slowly drained out of her as she looked into his eyes.

"Sira," he breathed, his eyes turning serious but still holding warmth, "I am truly sorry for telling the Dark Lord that you were planning to leave. I thought that it would actually assist your leave and it did, didn't it? You now have to be with the Snatchers, farther from our Lord but yet still loyal. Only, that was the only thing that I planned to have happen after I told him. I didn't mean for you to be tortured, I didn't mean for him to mock you, and I didn't mean for him to strip you of your rank. I'm sorry, Sira. It's my fault that you received what you did." Tears rimmed her eyes as her torture entered her mind again, causing her body to tremble. "Are you okay?" he asked, sounding a bit concerned about her sudden shaking.

"No," she exhaled as a sob rattled in her chest, causing her to fall into him. Her tears rolled down her face as she rested her head on his chest, just wanting the closeness. He led her slowly to her bed and sat down with her on the edge, his arms tightening around her. Her body quaked with her returning agony. Sirius' words filled her head, ringing in her ears as her heart sank in her chest. Even if they weren't really spoken, they still hurt.

"Sira," a muffled voice called as footsteps came up the staircase. She didn't notice but Lucius did, his eyes watching the door, waiting for it to open with fear in his heart. "Sira," the voice said again, coming closer to the room. The door opened slowly a few seconds later and Cal stepped into the room, looking shocked at first but then just furious. Her ice-blue eyes found Lucius instantly and bored into his, showing so much irritation towards him. "Don't you think you've caused enough damage?" she asked in a growl.

He released Sira from his arms and laid her down gently, trying not to upset her anymore. He stood, staring at Cal the world time and walked out of the room, knowing that he shouldn't fight or argue with her. When he left the room, Cal went to her friend. Sira looked as if she was trying to fall asleep but couldn't. "Don't worry, Sira," Cal whispered to her as Sira gazed at her dully. "Scabior's on his way home. He should be here soon." Sira gave her a small nod as she closed her eyes, trying to force away her pain.

The front door of the house closed with a slam as Scabior raced to the staircase. His face was full of concern as his pace continued to quicken, fueled by his fear. He had been with the Snatchers until he had received a Patronus from Cal saying that something horrible had happened to Sira and then he left them, not caring about anyone else or anything other than her. He feared the worst, but he didn't even know what the worst was.

He climbed the stairs two at a time, his hands trembling a little with his stress. Quickly, once he reached the top of the stairs, he turned and headed to the bedroom, just knowing she would be there. his hand pushed the door open slowly to see Sira lying in the bed, looking like she was fast asleep, and Cal sat in a chair at her bedside, finally looking at him after a second or two. Cal stood, her eyes serious, and walked towards him. Once out in the hall with him, she closed the door.

"What 'appened?" Scabior asked rapidly, a little confused but all in all worried. Cal shook her head, almost as if she didn't believe that any of this was actually happening.

"She was punished for wanting to leave the Death Eaters, Scabior," she stated, trying to remove her emotions from her voice. "She was stripped of her rank, mocked, tortured, and is being forced to become a Snatcher. He didn't use the Cruciatus Curse much on her; he was in her mind, forcing her to see horrible images. He broke her, making her scream most of the time and shake on the floor, causing her to beg for it to end. It was awful to witness and, even worse, was that I knew that I couldn't do anything." She hesitated, taking in a long breath. "There was nothing that I could do for her and I just wanted you to know that I did care about her and I wanted to help her. So, I came here because Lucius was ordered to bring her here. She was in bad shape and I knew she would want to rest but probably couldn't. When I found her, she was crying and Lucius was holding her in his arms."

Anger flared in his chest, making him want to snarl with his agitation and his disgust. Everything he ever did to make sure that she wouldn't fall back into Lucius' arms had failed as if he had done nothing. She had told him that she wouldn't go back to him and she did, she fell back to him. He turned away from Cal, furious with himself for not doing more and irritated with Sira for not knowing better. His hand slammed against the walls, making Cal jump a little as she watched him, and the sound filled the house for a brief second. He rested his forearm against the wall and then rested his forehead against it, thinking about what to do and what to say.

He didn't know, and that angered him further. He loved that girl dearly but sometimes he couldn't stand the things she put him through. She did whatever she wanted at times, never caring about what would happen to anyone else but herself and expecting that someone would be there for her to fix her mistakes. He was irritated with her for being so careless, she should've known better for what happened with Sirius. Sirius had been there for her and then he was gone and she finally had to see what would happen to her when no one was there to help her. Now, he treated her like Sirius did and look what she had gotten herself into.

He took a deep breath, trying to clear his mind a little.

Cal's gaze was still on him, watching him carefully as he calmed down gradually. He stayed there against the wall as he thought everything through. Was he truly mad at her? Was he really furious at her for what she did under the conditions it was in? The answer to both of these questions was no, he wasn't. She was under a lot of stress and she really didn't do anything. She was only in Lucius' arms, no more, no less. He sighed and he moved away from the wall, looking to Cal.

There was fear and concern in her eyes, a look that he had never before seen in them. "I need to be with 'er," he whispered, his voice low and tired like he had to be with her. Cal stepped in his path, making him halt before he was able to open the door.

"You're not seeing her if you're angry," Cal said flatly, her tone dead serious. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hands, looking down at the floor before returning his attention to her.

"I'm not angry," he breathed, "not anymore." Cal stepped away and he pushed the door open, completely focused on the girl in the bed. The door closed gently behind him and he treaded softly over to the bed, through the dark room and the shadows cast by the world outside the windows. His eyes focused on her form, still seeming asleep. She didn't move. She didn't stir. When he reached the bed, he pulled back the covers a little and sat on the edge as he started to unlace his boots. He took them off and then slid his jacket off of his shoulders before he laid himself down in beside her, looking into her stressed face.

She looked awful, like she couldn't stop thinking, like she couldn't stop remembering. He pulled her close to him and she moved even nearer as if she wanted the comfort of his arms, like it was the only thing she ever needed. "Scabior," she exhaled as her eyes finally shut all of the way. His arms squeezed her a bit tighter and he realized something. She had her flaws but she was still a good person, she still loved him and nothing could change that. She loved him for who he was, not who he could be. She wouldn't change him.

She raised her head a little and looked into his eyes; hers were bursting with her pain. "It was so horrible," she panted, barely able to say the words like they choked her. "I-." He hushed her; she didn't need to think about what had happened. He hated to see her in so much pain.

"You don't 'ave to talk 'bout it, beautiful," he whispered to hear as his fingers weaved into her hair. "I already know what 'appened." She rested her head on his shoulder, still looking up at him, and she let out a sigh. She just wished that the pain would stop and her mind would clear of the images and words of her torture. Her mind seemed to have unfogged a little since Scabior had come.

"Can you do something for me?" she asked in a whisper, finally breaking a long silence. His blue-grey eyes looked at her, filled with warmth and passion.

"I'd do anything for you," he said sweetly, his voice low and rich. Her body cuddled up to his, moving even nearer as her hands rested on his chest. They started to unbutton his shirt slowly, carefully undoing each button before sliding the shirt off of his shoulders. He pulled it off the rest of the way and tossed it aside. Her check rested right over his heart and she listened to it beat, comforted by the sound and the feel of his skin.

"Tell me that you love me," she stated slowly as she closed her eyes because a new wave of tears threatened to roll down her face. He hand his hands threw her dark-brown hair as he continued to watch her face. She was combatting her agony and she only needed his reassurance to get her through.

"I love you, Sira," he breathed into her ear as he pressed his body against hers to try to stop the starting trembles that quaked her body every so often. "I will always love you. You're so wonderful and beautiful and I would never change anything 'bout you." Her tears silently fell from her eyes, rolling down her face and onto his bare chest. As he continued to whisper the words of his love, sleep started to tug at her. Her pain faded and her body went numb. She could only feel the warmth of his body, his arms holding her close, and the rise and fall of his chest with each breath. The beating of his heart was a lullaby, causing her to relax and welcome the peacefulness of sleep. After a while, it finally took her away.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Sira felt a pair of arms around her, familiar and reassuring, and she slowly opened her blue eyes. She saw his face, his grey eyes watching her and terror filled her heart. She was back at Number 12 Grimmauld Place and it was happening again, just like it did before. "Sirius," she whispered and she tried to get away from him but his arms keep her close, no matter how hard she struggled. Her body was trembling with her terror. She didn't want to be yelled at again, she didn't want to have to hear those foul words again.

"Sira," he said gently as his eyes filled with his concern for her, "what's wrong?" Her eyes suddenly grew confused and she stopped her struggle against his arms.

"What?" she asked back, feeling nothing but shock and bafflement. Puzzlement filled his warm, grey eyes. "You, you aren't going to yell at me?" He shook his head a little and pulled her nearer to him, letting out a soft chuckle as he did so.

"Why would I do anything like that?" he asked, giving her a wide grin.

"But-," she murmured and he hushed her. Her eyes grew more confused, at least she was no longer afraid.

"Sira, you know that I don't feel that way about you," he stated proudly as he stroked her hair gently, "and you know that I would never say anything like that to you. What you saw was not me, even if he looked like me. He was not true, not reality. That was only what Lord Voldemort used to torment you because he knew how much you allied on me. He twisted your memory of me and used it against you but, no matter what, it was not me." She cuddled up to him, comforted by his words. She had known that it was false all along but she just needed to hear him say it, to confirm it. He chuckled and shook his head again. "Oh now you love me," he said playfully.

She nodded her head and she snuggled her body closer to his, wrapping her arms around him as he continued to chuckle. "I love you so much, Sirius," she said softly as she looked up into his face.

"I love you too," he said back gently, "and nothing can take that love away."

The soft light from the world outside filled the room and caused Scabior's blue-grey eyes to glitter as he gazed at Sira. She still lay in his arms, still asleep and still near to him. Her face was completely peaceful, showing no signs of stress or strain. Her sleep was calm and he knew that her dreams weren't bothering her, like he feared they would. The door to the room opened slowly and Cal stepped into the room, freezing to the spot when she locked eyes with him. She just stood there, wide-eyed like she just walked in on something private. Her ice-blue eyes looked at him, studying him as they almost showed a fear. "Are you decent?" she asked as her eyes fell on his bare chest, she was hoping he was only shirtless.

A mischievous smile formed on his face and then he threw back the covers to see her wince and look away, causing a laugh to rise out of his chest. "Cal, you can look," he stated and she slowly looked at him as he gestured to his plaid pants. He was clearly decent. Anger welled up in her ice-blue eyes as she examined him and then a cruel smile formed on her lips.

"Wow, Scabior," she hissed, "where did your abs go? Is someone getting flabby?" She tilted her head as she gazed at him, wanting revenge. He stopped laughing and glared at her. He was not 'flabby' because he still had some muscling, even if it wasn't as much as he had when he was with her. "I don't know how Sira can lie next to an insensitive jerk like you," she growled as she walked further into the room, her eyes never leaving his, "or did you force her to like you forced me to?"

"Give it a rest, Cal," he snarled as his anger started to show in his face.

"I don't understand how she can love a man like you," she jeered as her eyes became fiercer. "You're barely a man and you just go around from woman to woman like they are nothing. You love them and leave them. Do you want to leave Sira? Just like you left me?" He had enough of this, enough of the mocking just because she was still upset about him leaving her a few years ago. She knew that he loved Sira but she would never let him forget his old ways before he had her, the ways he wished he could just forget.

"At least I didn't 'ave to sell myself to find love," he barked and Cal froze, her jaw dropped a little and disbelief in her eyes. She couldn't believe that he had just said that. Cal dropped her eyes from his as she fought back the tears that wanted to fall from her eyes and then returned her gaze to him, shaking her head as she did so.

"You didn't just say that," she muttered as her eyes grew duller. His eyes softened a bit as he looked at her, he didn't mean to hurt her that much.

"I didn't mean to," he mumbled as he looked at Sira beside him, she was completely unaware of anything going on around her. "I really didn't." There was a long silence, both of them not talking and just furious with each other. "Did the Dark Lord ever say when she had to leave for the Snatchers? And what gang she had to join?" Cal looked at him, puzzled that he wasn't going to fight her anymore.

"No, he never said anything," she stated as he looked at her. "Why do you ask?"

"She could come with me," he replied softly. "She doesn't 'ave to be completely alone. I can care for 'er and I can watch over 'er." He looked back to Sira, wrapping an arm around her. "I could make it okay, I could make it so it's not a punishment."

"When would you leave?" she asked as she looked at her friend.

"As soon as she feels ready," he stated as he pulled her close and held her, thinking that she would probably be happier with the Snatchers than with the Death Eaters. He hoped that she would.

Her blue eyes opened to find herself still in Scabior's arms. She stretched, trying to wake herself up and he looked at her, his attention turning to her as she stirred. "Good morning, beautiful," he whispered as a sleepy smile formed on her lips and her eyes gazed into his. She felt so much better than she did before. She felt relieved, even if her body was a little sore. "'ow are you feeling?"

"Good," she exhaled, "just a little stiff." She snuggled up to him, amazed that she felt so good. His hand ran through her hair caressingly as he smiled at her, glad that she was feeling fine.

"I don't mean to rush you but, since the Dark Lord ordered you to be a Snatcher, when do you want to go?" he questioned quickly, seeming eager to soon have her with him at all times again. Confusion entered her eyes as she lifted her head off of his chest.

"'e didn't tell you when you 'ad to go or which gang you 'ad to join," he stated proudly as he gazed at her compassionately, "so you can go whenever you want and you can join whichever gang you want." She dropped her eyes, rethinking what the Dark Lord had said to her. Scabior was right; all he said was that she was to be a Snatcher. Then, a realization rose in her mind, causing her to look back into his face.

"I don't know how to be a Snatcher," she muttered. He let out a light chuckle.

"It's probably easier than being a Death Eater," he said gently, "and you get paid."

"I don't care about getting paid," she sighed as she rested her head on his chest again. He chuckled again as his arms wrapped around her a little tighter.

"I know you don't," he breathed, "but the point is being a Snatcher isn't difficult. We just catch people, take them to the Ministry, and collect our reward." Her stomach churned at his words, show would have to collect Muggle-borns and send them to their punishment. She didn't think she could handle it, she didn't think she had the heart to do it. At least, if she went with Scabior, he would be there to comfort her. That seemed like the only good thing about being a Snatcher to her right now, and it was the only thing making her want to go.

"Which gang do you belong to?" she asked, breaking a long silence and breaking away from her thoughts.

"Greyback's," Scabior answered flatly and disbelief covered her face.

"Fenrir Greyback's? The werewolf?" she asked. She had never liked Fenrir much. He was demanding, evil, sick, and twisted. She just wanted to snarl at the thought of him. She hoped that nothing else was wrong about this situation.

"Yes," he said, "is that a problem?" His blue-grey eyes looked at her, not wanting there to be a problem.

"No," she breathed, "its fine. I just don't like him the best." She stretched a little again. "So, when do you want to leave?"

"Whenever you're ready and feel up to it," he stated as he held her tighter, his eagerness becoming more present and pronounced.

"After I collect a few things," she said quickly as she pulled herself out of his arms, "let's go. I'm as ready as I'll ever be." She gave him a gently smile, which he returned, and started to get her things.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Sira's pack fell to the forest floor as a sigh escaped her chest. Her eyes looked at the little tents around her and the small campsite. There was a small pile of coals that were growing cold and there were a few canvas chairs sitting out in between the tents. She wasn't impressed but she didn't expect it to be much anyways. Scabior stood beside her, placing his hand tenderly on her shoulder. "Well, this is it," he exhaled and then headed over to one of the farthest tents, pulling back the entrance's flap when he reached it.

"So where is everyone?" she asked as she picked up her pack and headed over to him.

"They should be 'ere soon," he stated and she nodded and entered the tent, pulling her pack along with her. "Its 'bout time they should be returning from today's scouting." He entered the tent after she did and found her walking around inside of it, studying everything with fascination. "What?"

"I didn't expect any of this," she said as she looked at the fine furniture and the tasteful decorations. It was beautiful, stunning, and quite homey, along with being spacious and well-planned. She didn't expect a tent, even a magical tent, to look like this; it was all so perfect and warm.

"Is that bad?" he asked, seeming to be growing concerned.

"No," she said with a smile as she turned to face him, "not at all. I thought that I was going to be roughing it." She let out a little laugh and he came closer to her.

"I'm glad that you like it," he said as he took her bag from her hands and slung it over his shoulder, his eyes never looking away from her. He walked away from her slowly and pulled back a flap of canvas and exposed a bedroom, which he entered and set her pack down in. Curiosity filled her and she followed him into the new room.

It was fairly large, warm and bright, just like the rest of the tent, but what surprised her was how similar it was to her bedroom back in her house. The bed, the dressers, and the placing of them were almost exactly the same. She felt Scabior's gaze fall heavily on her as she looked around but she didn't care. She actually kind of liked it here.

Then, muffled voices came from outside the tent, causing her head to turn to the sound. Scabior heard them too and, with a turn on his heel, was out of the room and she followed him closely. In an instant, they were out of the tent and standing in the campsite, their eyes focused on the approaching figures. There were five of them, all male and all brimming with a victory. Her eyes locked with the largest man long before the others realized she was there. Fenrir, she growled in her mind as he came closer, his walk becoming more swaggering and animalistic with each step he took. Her eyes never left his, even when a cruel smile twisted his hideous face.

Once he was finally close enough, he stopped and everyone else halted behind him. "Scabior, you've come back," Fenrir said in a snarl, his eyes still focused on Sira. "It's good to see you and you've brought your bitch with you." Anger flared in her chest and she took a step towards the werewolf.

"Excuse me?" she asked in a growl, her rage entering her eyes. "What did you just call me?"

"Sira, don't," Scabior breathed as he reached out for her, causing Greyback to laugh menacingly.

"That's right, Scabior," he barked with his laughter. "Control your bitch." The smile and the laughter wiped off his face and his eyes grew suddenly icy and serious. "You don't want to see what I do to bitches that don't know their place and that step out of line," he hissed as he stepped closer to her carefully, coming close enough to touch her face with his grimy hands. "Such tender skin, I bet it would be so sweet to taste."

At his last word, a snarl broke out of her chest and her fist connected with his jaw, making him let out a low and dangerous growl as he regained balance and lunged at her. She was going to pay for that.

She was too quick; she had already shifted into a wolf when he started his lunge. Her body jumped to the side, dodging his attack completely, and then her jaws sank into his leg. A howl of pain escaped his throat and he slashed at her, his 'clawed' hand barreling down towards her.

When she realized she needed to move, she was too late to do anything. His fingernails ripped into her flesh, sending pain through her body like a wildfire. She snarled and lunged at his throat, gazing into his vicious eyes as she did so.

The next thing she knew, she was hitting the ground hard. Pain jolted through her, she thought she heard something crack, but she jumped back up to her feet and raced towards him, her ribcage bursting with pain at every, single movement. He slashed at her again, but she threw herself at him, her jaws catching his outstretched arm.

Another pained howl escaped from him as her jaws sank deeper into his flesh. His free hand grasped the scruff of her neck and forced her off of him. She could feel the flesh moving as her teeth raked through it as he pulled her. He threw her to the side again, his eyes examining the wound she left him, letting out a disgusted snarl as she hit the ground and rolled quite a distance.

Her eyes were still fixed on him as she pulled herself to stand again, a snarl twisting her face and exposing her fangs. Her breathing was labored and she made no movement towards him. They just watched each other. Blood oozed from the wounds that they had inflicted on each other. Their eyes held the same look, the same longing. The other Snatchers looked between them, watching intently for the next move. Sira finally realized that she had many more injuries than she thought she had for her body was flooding with pain at each breath she took and her coat was went with her blood in multiple places.

She could feel the eyes on her, wanting her to make the next move while one was only wanting her to stop, to quit. She would never quit, she would quit when she was dead. Finding some strength, she barreled towards Fenrir again, her eyes burning with her fury and her jaws open, at the ready. He was expecting her to do that.

She jumped, throwing herself at him and his hand caught her throat, his fingers digging in as he body suddenly stopped lunging. His hand held her up, hanging her in midair as her vision started to blur. She was suffocating.

He let out a cackle of harsh laughter as she struggled against his grip, her paws digging at his hands and her mouth trying desperately to rap around his wrist. "You don't mess with me, bitch," he snarled as she fought harder. His hand released and, finally, her mouth wrapped around his wrist, snarling as she did so.

His other hand pulled her jaws off of him and she fell to the forest floor with a thud. Dazed and confused, she looked up to see him barreling down onto her. His fingers tore at her flesh, causing her to howl and yelp with her pain. Before she knew it, his hands braced her down as his wolfish teeth sank into her. Her yelps became pained screams and shrieks.

Each bite sent pain through her. Her breathes became rapid and frantic with the agony and her vision became more blurry. She was being ripped apart and no one was doing anything about it, Scabior wasn't even doing anything. Her eyes found him and she just watched him. If she was going to die right now, at the hands of Fenrir, she wanted Scabior to be the last thing she saw.

He never looked away from her. His face seemed relaxed and so did his body but his blue-grey eyes told a different story. He was horrified and he knew that he could do nothing to help her. If Fenrir wanted her dead, then dead she would be. No one could change his mind, no one could stop him. Silently, he hoped he would stop; he didn't want to have to witness the death of his fiancé and especially not her death in this way.

After a few minutes, the pressure of his hands left her and he no longer tore into her but she hurt too much to do anything. He stood up and walked away from her, barking something at his Snatchers. She didn't understand the words he said for her eyelids were growing heavy. She fought off the pain and the exhaustion but it was defeating her. The very last thing she saw before the blackness overwhelmed her was Scabior sprinting towards her.

Her eyes opened to see the canvas ceiling of the tent and to feel a stinging sensation in her left arm. She let out a little hiss as she jerked it away, only to be grabbed. "No," a male voice, which sounded so comforting to her, said softly. His hand held her wrist as he pressed a towel soaked with some astringent to her wound.

"Scabior," she breathed as she looked at him. She was back in her human form somehow but she didn't care about that. She was just happy to be alive. His eyes looked up into her face rapidly with the sound of her voice, stopping everything that he was doing.

"I 'ope you don't mind that I'm trying to mend you," he stated as he put his towel on a small table beside him. His eyes searched the table and he picked up a bottle of some potion and then started to drip it on the wound.

"I don't mind," she said kindly, just before she realized something. Other than two towels, her necklace and some bandages, there was nothing covering her. Her head turned a little to look past Scabior to a pile of bloodied and ruined clothes. Oh well, she thought. "How bad are my wounds?" she asked, her attention turning back to him and she finally noticed that his shirt was unbuttoned and showing his bare chest.

"They're cursed wounds, you know that," he said as he bandaged her now-closing wound on her arm. The potion worked fast and she didn't even feel a thing. "Other than that, I don't think they're serious and they should 'eal quickly because of what I've done." He smiled a little as he looked for other wounds to mend, there were none.

"I'm sorry that 'e did that to you, lovely," he muttered as his eyes returned to her face again, "and I'm sorry that there was nothing I could do to stop 'im. 'e's just not merciful and, if I did something, I feared that 'e would 'arm you even worse than 'e did. I didn't want that, so I stayed back. I 'ope you can forgive me." She nodded her head a little as she sat up a little in the bed.

"You were amazing though," he said proudly, "when you fought Fenrir. You 'ad such a fire burning in your eyes and in each movement you made. You were furious; you wanted 'im dead and you wouldn't stop until 'e was. You almost defeated 'im, you could've but 'e started playing scrappy. 'ow dangerous that was though, rarely anyone leaves a fight with 'im not severely 'armed. Its luck that you're 'ere with me now." She gave him a little smile.

"It's not the first time I've dueled a dangerous opponent and walked away still alive and aware," she said, a bit arrogant. "I've dueled Bellatrix twice." He chuckled a little as he nodded his head.

"Yeah, you're right," he stated happily. "I'm just glad that you're still alive after all of this."

"I am too," she exhaled with a big smile.

"Do you 'urt?" he questioned gently and a confused look entered her eyes. Did she hurt? She hadn't really thought about it for she hadn't felt anything, which baffled her. It seemed like a miracle to her.

"No, not at all," she responded and a sudden desire entered his eyes, causing her smile to become seductive as her eyes reflected his longing. He stood from his chair and pulled the shirt off of his shoulder. Her eyes never left him; they never wanted to leave him. She laughed a bit, a soft, provocative laugh. He climbed into the bed, on top of her, and then her mouth met his fiercely. Everything she had just done was worth it now and satisfaction filled her chest. The only thing that could've made the moment even better was if she could get the taste of Fenrir's blood out of her mouth.


End file.
